Opinion/Leedom: Indiscretions can be forgiven, serial lies cannot
Discretion: The quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offense or revealing private information. Indiscretion: Behavior or speech that shows a lack of good judgment. — Merriam Webster dictionary
We’ve all been discrete, as in “You look fine in fuscia.” When, he/she, in your opinion, did not look fine. This kind of discretion is kind and won’t hurt even though it’s a fib.
We’ve all been indiscreet, sometimes knowingly, sometimes (oops) not. We didn’t think before we spoke, and what we said was hurtful to someone else or just plain dumb. It’s not discrete to blurt out, "What a jerk you are!", and be sorry later. We can’t take back indiscreet remarks. Look before you leap, hold your tongue and other cliches attest to this.
Such are the vagaries of venturing into a political life these days. Past indiscretions, however minor and however long ago, may come back to haunt candidates. Elections have been won and lost based on revelations of what’s acceptable or not at any given time. Gary Hart learned this too late. He faded fast. Remember him? Remember the photo of this presidential candidate with a model? Pffft, there went Gary Hart.
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Candidates may deny with vehemence, but those ages-past little acts of some form of cheating are out there for all to see and hear. Today nothing is, as the saying goes, off the record. Interviewers have always heard the interviewee say what he or she says next is “off the record.” This means the discreet questioner agrees to not print or broadcast the remark. However, there are indiscreet ways to get the remark public. People answering interviewers’ questions should not say anything is off the record. Better not say anything at all.
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Better not say anything near a mic at a public gathering. Pols have been caught using sensitive, and worse, language thinking the mic was off. Oops.
The prevalence of social media channels means nothing is secret. Some sites are so mundane one wonders why posters think readers care what they ate for breakfast or what their grandchildren’s extracurricular activities are. But these are not offending anyone — breakfast and activities — unless they involve someone or something that is, uh, not discreet.
It’s not just words. It’s all the other stuff posters post. Is it discreet to post oneself in revealing attire or stand in front of a phone’s camera and declare you’re pro this or anti that or that you wish so-and-so would leave the country or the universe? Would you want your “likes” to see you in weird, or worse, wanton places? A seedy saloon? A tawdry tattoo parlor? No sirree.
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It seems irrational that people who are public figures — presidents, premiers, celebs, CEOs — would risk their careers and relationships by indiscretions. But they have and do.
Few knew of FDR’s “indiscretions” until the 1960s. There were no social media. Those who did know kept quiet because he was the man who led a nation through perilous times.
How did a president think he’d not get caught — with an intern? How did Bernie Madoff think he could get away with bilking his clients? Did O.J. not get convicted of murder because he was rich? Jimmy Carter, nice guy, admitted to having “lust,” but only in his heart. How refreshing was that? Thomas Jefferson’s biography is still being revealed. Camelot was tarnished. presidents of yore may or may not have fathered children with women, including slaves, who were not their wives. And this is only in America. The world has been filled with fooling around.
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We forgive. We forgive ourselves and those we trusted and trust in for so-called indiscretions. But we don’t like those who lie and continue to lie when all evidence reveals the person in question wasn’t telling the truth. Amen.
Barbara Leedom is a columnist for the Cape Cod Times. Email her at bleedom@gmail.com.
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This article originally appeared on Cape Cod Times: Politicians are forever getting caught committing indiscretions, lying
