Oxford shooting survivor: Leaders have failed to stop school shootings. It's up to us.

Nov. 30, 2021, is the day every student's nightmare became my reality. Permanently carved into my brain is the memory of arriving at American Sign Language class with my friends, uncharacteristically on time, when we heard that noise — pops like balloons — coming from the hallway. We cowered behind our wooden desks, quivering as we struggled for a plan to reach safety. Every one of our hearts pounded with complete and utter terror.

It feels like we hid in that room for five minutes, and five hours. Once we pulled ourselves through the window, though, literally running for our lives, time went into high speed. All around me at the Meijer parking lot, our makeshift sanctuary, people searched hysterically for friends, neighbors and family members.

That day, a shooter had entered Oxford High School and left four of my classmates dead.

I will never againget another pool day with Madisyn Baldwin, her little sisters, and cousin. I will never again watch Tate Myre inspire middle schoolers, or laugh in first hour with his friends. I will never again be both pestered and amused by how loud Justin Shilling was at the football games. I will never again hear Hana St. Juliana’s infectious laugh.

After seven long months, I have finally had a few peaceful nights of sleep. Yet periods of time have vanished from my brain. There are days that I wake up not knowing the year. I don’t want to look at my phone to find out. I can no longer stomach loud noises and sudden movements. I am, and always will be, on guard.

I was drowning before. Now I am floating. I want to be able to swim to shore from this sea of grief.

As a youth member of March For Our Lives (MFOL), I lobbied and spoke at the Michigan Capitol in February to advocate for secure firearm storage and increased mental health resources in schools. In June, I was invited to Washington D.C. to lobby, speak and march as we demanded that Congress take action. And they did. A few weeks later, I went back to D.C. for an event at the White House celebrating the package we pushed for: The Bipartisan Safer Communities Act. It’s far from perfect, but it’s a start.

Recently, I began therapy, where I have the space and safety to delve into what I am feeling with a professional. It is both incredibly challenging and rewarding. However, access to a mental health professional isn’t readily available to most Michiganders, and especially young people. Yet, we are the ones who bear the brunt of the gun violence epidemic. In fact, firearms are our leading cause of death.

More:Attorney: Armed Oxford Schools security guard didn't take opportunity to stop shooter

More:Detroit Youth Choir confronts gun violence with its version of 'Sweet Child o' Mine'

As the school year begins, children are once again placed in harm's way. Whether it’s through anxiety-inducing active shooter drills, violent threats or school shootings, the youth of Michigan are suffering from gun violence.

So, we, the young people of March For Our Lives Michigan, were forced to take action to address the combined crisis of gun violence and mental health. Through consistent advocacy, including actions like a lobby day where over 50 youth from across the state met with dozens of representatives, a letter-writing campaign and collaborations with government officials across our state, we proved to lawmakers that our lives and mental well-being matter. The state budget passed with $250 million allocated for student mental health, $15 million in cross-system intervention to prevent mass violence, and $1 million for gun violence reduction research.

We lobbied, we organized and we won.

Despite this victory, there were many parts of the state budget that work against the forward progress. Significant money was given to School Resource Officers, despite ample evidence proving the harm they cause, especially in predominantly Black and brown cities like Flint and Detroit where power imbalances and discrimination fuel the school-to-prison pipeline. Many studies have found that students of color and those with disabilities are more likely to receive a harsh punishment for standard misbehavior. School Resource Officers are not a solution to ending gun violence but another way to over-police populations that are already at risk.

While states like New Jersey and Delaware have passed gun violence legislation following the recent shootings in Buffalo, N.Y. and Uvalde, Tex., the Michigan House and Senate GOP have made clear that they value guns over our lives. Despite attempts from Democrats, including state Sen. Rosemary Bayer, gun violence prevention legislation is consistently barred from serious negotiations.

Following the shooting at my school, Republican lawmakers offered little more than thoughts and prayers. Instead, Senate Majority Leader Mike Shirkey prevented a hearing or vote from even taking place. In April, he finally agreed to hold a combined hearing on safe storage and extreme risk protection orders, but there has since been no talk of this coming to fruition.

Gun violence is not a partisan matter, it’s a matter of life or death. Michigan's GOP must stop choosing death. It is far past time for the GOP to prioritize the safety of their constituents over their prospects for the next election cycle.

To every Michigander reading this, I ask you to take action in whatever capacity you can. Have conversations about gun violence prevention with your family and friends. If you’re able, donate to a gun violence prevention organization of your choice. Write to your elected officials, and speak up at your town hall meetings. But above all else, do something. Our leaders have failed us, and so we’re left wondering: Who will be next? We can’t afford to wait to find out.

Zoe Touray, 18, is a survivor of the Oxford High School shooting and a youth member of March For Our Lives.

This article originally appeared on Detroit Free Press: Oxford survivor: Leaders have failed on gun control. It's up to us.