Paddy and Christine McGuinness: Our Family and Autism, review: there's a lot to learn from this brave film
It is a strange fact that people often say more in the presence of a television camera than they do in private. I suppose it’s a bit like going to see a counsellor: a process of self-examination and a chance to unburden yourself.
In Paddy and Christine McGuinness: Our Family and Autism (BBC One), the couple spoke about the unusual challenges of raising their children. And they – Paddy especially – were learning as much as the viewers were about how to navigate a way through this diagnosis, confronting feelings that were previously too difficult to express.
I am not in a position to say whether or not the documentary was helpful to parents of children with autism, but it explained a great deal about the condition.
All three of their children – eight-year-old twins Leo and Penelope, and five-year-old Felicity – are autistic. Christine soon accepted the fact but Paddy struggled. He found it hard to talk about it, even with Christine, and instead threw himself into work. At some point, he was diagnosed with clinical depression. “It dawned on me: that’s it. That’s it forever. They’re not going to get better.”
Autism is a spectrum, and the McGuinness children are not at the extreme end. Paddy called it “invisible autism”. His children are verbal, and his elder daughter is able to “mask” her condition – girls are better at mimicking the behaviour of those around them to fit in. If you saw them having a meltdown in the supermarket aisle, you might dismiss them simply as badly-behaved children, which would be entirely wrong. Other children, such as the son of former footballer Paul Scholes – interviewed here – have more severe learning difficulties; Scholes admitted that at one stage he feared his son may have to go into care.
Autism may have a genetic component, according to expert Prof Simon Baron-Cohen, and Christine was diagnosed with a mild form. Her sensitivity to certain sorts of food, difficulty socialising, dislike of clutter – all could be attributed to the condition.
And it showed us the emotional toll. Paddy cried as he wondered if his son knows what love is. “Every night I say, ‘Who’s your best friend?’ And he’ll say, ‘You are.’ But I think to myself, is he just saying that or does he know that?”
The need to wrap things up in an hour-long programme meant that the ending felt a little forced. But it was moving to see Paddy address the subject with such honesty, and the McGuinnesses’ love for their children shone through.
