Brian Laundrie's notebook appears to include a confession that he killed Gabby Petito.
"I ended her life. I thought it was merciful, that it is what she wanted," it said.
Laundrie also said he chose to kill himself because he couldn't "live another day without her."
Brian Laundrie's notebook, recovered from a Florida swamp by the FBI, appears to include a confession that he was the one who killed Gabby Petito.
"I ended her life," the notebook said, Fox News reported Friday. "I thought it was merciful, that it is what she wanted, but I see now all the mistakes I made. I panicked. I was in shock."
He wrote that he chose to kill her after she injured herself from a fall in Wyoming.
"From the moment I decided, took away her pain, I knew I couldn't go on without her," Laundrie wrote, according to the Fox News images.
Laundrie and Petito set out on a cross-country road trip in fall 2021 that ended in both of their deaths. They had heavily documented their travels on social media, and it was made public that Petito went missing on September 11.
Laundrie returned home to his parents' house in Florida until he, too, went missing on September 13. Shortly after, he was named a person of interest in Petito's death.
Petito's body was found at a remote campsite in the Bridger-Teton National Forest on September 19. Her cause of death was unclear at first, but nearly a month later, the Teton County coroner said Petito's cause of death was strangulation.
It wasn't until October 21 that authorities found remains confirmed to be Laundrie's in Florida's Carlton Reserve. They also recovered a backpack full of his things, including the notebook.
A medical examiner on November 23 ruled Laundrie's death a suicide.
"I Loved you more than anything," the note — which is addressed to "Gabby" — in Laundrie's notebook continued, according to Fox News' images.
"I can't bear to look at our photos, to recall great times because it is why I cannot go on," he wrote. "When I close my eyes I will think of laying on the roof of the van, falling asleep to the sight of a meteor shower at the crystal geyser. I will always love you."
He apologized to "everyone this will affect," namely Petito's family, whom he wrote he "loves," Fox News reported.
"Please do not make this harder for them. This occurred as an unexpected tragedy," Laundrie wrote.
In the note, Laundrie described the injury he said Petito suffered, saying that he heard a "splash and a scream" near where they were camping in Utah, where Laundrie said temperatures were below freezing.
When he said he found her in the water, he said she was "freezing cold" and had "a small bump on her forehead that eventually got larger." He said he tried to carry her to safety but was unsure where their car was parked and that Petito wouldn't let him carry her back across the creek she fell into.
He described lying with Petito, who would get angry whenever Laundrie shook her awake from sleep, he said, because he was fearful she had a concussion.
He said he did not know the extent of her injuries, "only that she was in extreme pain."
Laundrie wrote that he then "rushed home to spend any time I had left with my family."
He added that he considered driving north to where Petito's family lived and letting her stepdad or brother kill him as "I'm sure they would have liked to."
"I am ending my life not because of a fear of punishment but rather because I can't stand to live another day without her. I've lost our whole future together, every moment we could have cherished," Laundrie wrote at the end of his note, Fox News reported.
"I'm sorry for everyone's loss. Please do not make life harder for my family, they lost a son and a daughter. The most wonderful girl in the world. Gabby I'm sorry," he added.
"I have killed myself by this creek in the hopes that animals may tear me apart. That it may make some of her family happy," Laundrie wrote. "Please pick up all of my things. Gabby hated people who litter."
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