'Make me pay for it': McDowell tells jurors before sentencing in Nassau deputy's slaying
Patrick McDowell chose to address the court for a final time before jurors decide his fate for killing Nassau County Deputy Joshua Moyers. He basically made the decision for them.
He said he went into the sentencing hearings thinking maybe he “could be convinced that I don’t deserve a harsh sentence, but I was wrong.”
“I gave my testimony and I listened to people comment that I’m remorseful, so I should be allowed to live, and that sickens me,” he said with a little more anger than the first time he testified.
“Make no mistake I am sorry and hate myself for what I did. But that’s simply not enough to outweigh the aggravators by any imaginable standard," he said. "The Moyers family deserves justice, [his fiancee] Ivy Carter deserves justice, Deputy Moyers himself and his fellow officers deserve justice. I don’t want your mercy, and I definitely don’t deserve it. I can’t take away the pain I’ve caused, but I can pay for it, so make me pay for it.”
McDowell, 37, of Jacksonville provided Thursday's testimony before closing arguments. In prefacing what he was about to say, he said a lot would be similar to what he already testified. But he emphasized some would be new and against his attorneys' advice. He pleaded guilty last year in March.
He apologized again to the Moyers family and all the people he hurt.
“He put himself in harm’s way between a criminal and the people he swore to protect … And for that I shot him and left him there to die," McDowell said of the 29-year-old deputy. "There’s no worst tragedy, no worst crime and no worst person than a creature who’s capable of doing something so brutal to a good man. I do not deserve to live a long life … I deserve what I gave him. He deserved better, but I do not. Let me be clear, this is not a plea for my life or for my death. This is a plea for justice for Deputy Moyers and his family. I’ve listened to the same witnesses, the same experts, the same evidence as all of you have, and I’m not convinced.”
“If someone killed my stepdad, brother, my friends who are cops in such a cold, selfish, callous way, I’d want them dead and hell with whatever excuses they present to explain it way," he told the court. "I can’t live with the thought of the murder I committed being overshadowed by my life, military service, my tragic experiences and my drug use. I don’t want to die, but why should what I want matter?”
Grief and emptiness: Here's what slain Nassau deputy's family said during sentencing
He was referencing much of the testimony about his exemplary service in the U.S. Marines, but coming home from Iraq suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder and becoming addicted to drugs.
Next the jury must decide to recommend the death penalty or life in prison sentence. A revised law allows for an 8-4 majority, as opposed to unanimous, to decide if execution should be the punishment.
This article originally appeared on Florida Times-Union: Patrick McDowell tells jurors to make him pay for killing Nassau deputy
