Pee-wee Herman and the complications of talking about people after they die

  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.

Social media feeds fill to the brim with capital "RIP" letters and heart emojis after a prolific celebrity dies. Well, not always.

Take Paul Reubens, also known as children's entertainer Pee-wee Herman, who died recently after a private battle with cancer at age 70. People were quick to bring up his registered sex offender status on social media in the wake of his death. In 2004, Reubens pleaded guilty through his attorney to possession of obscene materials with the intent to distribute, and in a court hearing he acknowledged possessing 170 images of minors engaged in sexual conduct, a spokesman for the city attorney's office said at the time. And many recalled how in 1991, Reubens pleaded no contest to an indecent exposure charge after his arrest in Sarasota, Florida, for allegedly exposing himself in an adult movie theater.

Think, too, about Jerry Lee Lewis, who died last year at 87. His career tanked after it came out that at age 22 he married his 13-year-old cousin.

Often mentions of these moments erupt in controversy, which is not surprising. After someone dies, fans often turn on those who try to disparage them.

Experts say no timeline exists for when it's OK to talk negatively about someone after they die. Rather, they say, a celebrity's alleged misdeeds as well as how they died may impact the appropriateness of various responses.

Paul Reubens, also known as children's entertainer Pee-wee Herman, died recently after a private battle with cancer at age 70.
Paul Reubens, also known as children's entertainer Pee-wee Herman, died recently after a private battle with cancer at age 70.

Take comedy icon Jerry Lewis or Hugh Hefner. Both died in 2017 at age 91, but their names have popped up well after their deaths. Several of Lewis' female former co-stars accused him of sexual harassment and punitive behavior in an article last year in Vanity Fair. And Hefner's former girlfriends, Playmates and employees alleged a culture of abuse in A&E's documentary series "Secrets of Playboy."

More than enough time has passed to allow for a closer examination of these stars, Robert Thompson, founding director of the Bleier Center for Television and Popular Culture at the Newhouse School of Public Communications Syracuse University, previously told USA TODAY.

In fact, these conversations may have happened a lot sooner if these stars died today.

"There did used to be a sense that there was this almost sacred space after someone had died," Thompson says. "You didn't say anything bad at their funeral and you waited a certain time before you said something bad thereafter. That included your uncle, and it included celebrities."

The internet and social media altered the way people communicate. Newspaper editors and heads of television stations previously called the shots on what was appropriate to talk about. Now? Individuals speak freely, online, whenever they want.

"The lines of 'appropriate' and 'inappropriate' grief expressions, public conversations about their lives on social media – both positive and negative – and time limits, are immediately blurred and often unacknowledged," Melvin L. Williams, associate professor of communication studies at Pace University, also previously told USA TODAY.

Different cases call for different responses after someone dies, of course, including how someone died.

Our collective raised consciousness – which has grown in the last decade in tandem with the rise of social media – only accelerated further due to the #MeToo movement. Many stories never discussed before, particularly about prominent men and their abuses of power, suddenly saw the light of day.

"I don't think there will be any time period after, let's say, Harvey Weinstein or Bill Cosby die," Thompson says. "They will be open season for that kind of thing. We already saw it with Jeffrey Epstein. Nobody was waiting to be polite to Jeffrey Epstein until X number of time had passed."

More on Pee-wee: Paul Reubens, Pee-wee Herman actor and comedian, dies at 70 after private cancer battle

Reaction to Epstein's 2019 death was exactly how it should have been, Williams says.

"There should be conversational differences when speaking of a convicted celebrity versus an alleged criminal celebrity figure," Williams says. "However, in the court of public opinion, there exist gray areas where some alleged celebrity figures never supersede their accusations, even when proven innocent."

These days, even the nicest person in the world could die and some people would still stomp on their (virtual) grave.

"Social media has really lowered the barriers of what's considered polite and decent," Thompson adds. "But I don't want to say that's necessarily a bad thing because we were a little too polite and decent about a lot of things that we didn't talk about that we should have been talking about."

Contributing: The Associated Press

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Pee-wee Herman and talking about troubled people after they die