Viral post suggests what UK cities would be like at a party: ‘Newcastle didn’t bring a coat’

A post asking people on social media to describe British cities and towns as if they were party guests has gone viral, receiving thousands of responses.

The Twitter account Very British Problems asked its 3.9 million followers on Saturday (29 October): “Let’s pretend every city/town in Britain is a guest at a party. What is each one doing at the party?”

So far, the post has received just under 3,000 responses, with Harry Potter star Oliver Phelps writing: “Birmingham is correcting anybody who calls them Northern or Southern.”

A user weighed in on Scottish cities, writing: “Glasgow is in the kitchen smoking fags and drinking all the booze. Edinburgh is by the vinyl collection/bookcase looking on disapprovingly. Dundee is in the bedroom taking meth and Aberdeen is wandering around aimlessly.”

Another said: “Wrexham is drunkenly trying to show everyone their selfie with Ryan Reynolds,” while Steven added: “Liverpool and Manchester are in the corner arguing over music. Manchester decides to play ‘Wonderwall’.”

Very British Problems also posed the question on its Instagram page, where it got more responses: “London is telling a story, very loudly which everyone else is being forced to listen to, begrudgingly,” said one user.

Another added: “Newcastle didn’t bring a coat”, while a third said: “Every Yorkshire town is in the kitchen arguing about how to make the best brew.”

One person commented: “Leeds has pissed in the sink,” while another added: “Grimsby has blocked the toilet.”

“Edinburgh won’t speak to anyone until they find out what school they went to,” one user said, while someone else mused that “Oxford and Cambridge are having drunk intellectual conversations in a corner, turning their noses up at everyone else”.

“Sunderland is nicking everyone’s cans and walking home with ya wheelie bin,” one person said, while another added: “Marlborough is hunting for the champers, rah-ing about the place and seriously hoping the snacks are from Waitrose.”

Very British Problems also encouraged social media users to split London by boroughs, to which one person replied: “Islington brought some quinoa and knitted yoghurt and was still woke [sic] at five in the morning,” while another added: “Westminster is insisting it is not a party.”