It’s the Perfect Time for Lisa Rinna to Become the M&M Spokesperson

She may have been fired from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but it’s time to own it. Lisa Rinna is meant for something even greater. And it's time she takes her rightful throne as the M&M spokesperson.

The Lisa Rinna M&M meme has transcended time. I wake up in the morning yearning to look at it. I’ve spent months editing it into countless photos of me and my friends. I bought coasters with her on it.

This meme is the modern embodiment of Plato’s Allegory of the Cave. Now that I’ve seen it, I can’t ever be satisfied by a life without Lisa Rinna M&M.

And I’m not alone. The meme has caused a cultural revolution. All it took was a 2006 M&M ad campaign, a K-pop song and a Twitter user with a dream. From September to October, if I saw any Twitter video I expected a Lisa Rinna M&M jump scare. And I was right 97 percent of the time.

The Lisa Rinna M&M meme made up the best comedy of 2022. She was an institution. From the photo of her arriving in the U.K. as Queen Elizabeth died to the genuinely haunting short film exploring the inner psyche of the M&M that should win an Oscar (sorry All Too Well: 10 Minute Version, this is actual cinema), she defined an entire subculture of the internet. She is hypnotic and utterly haunting in her approach.

The thing is, the magic of the meme isn’t rocket science. Humanoid M&M’s are funny. Lisa Rinna is funny. You put those lips and classic shag cut on an M&M with some white gloves and a microphone and you’ll get gold.

So, why has Mars, Inc. let this magical marketing opportunity dissipate? Was Rinna too busy filming RHOBH? Did all the time she spent posting increasingly unhinged and cryptic Instagram stories fill her schedule?

Whatever it is, there’s no excuse anymore. In the proverbial words of Kim Kardashian, get your ass up and work, Mars. Call Rinna up and give her the contract of a lifetime so she can do what she does best—be an M&M.

This woman shamelessly hawked diapers. I’m confident she’d nibble some M&M’s and hop into a voice-acting booth. After all, we live in an age where celebrities endorse the randomest products known to man. At least this makes intrinsic sense.

Think of all the horrible commercials we’ve had to sit through. I’m still washing the horror of the Kris Jenner Shutterfly ad away every night before bed. I wish more than anything that I’d never have to hear Kaley Cuoco talk about whatever Priceline is again.

But I’d downgrade my Hulu subscription to include ads if it meant I got to see Lisa Rinna in an M&M commercial.

I’d buy tickets to watch it in theaters. Chills creep down my spine as I consider the 1-2 punch of the Nicole Kidman AMC ad followed by a Lisa Rinna M&M ad. Oscars. Emmys. I will pay full price on a Tuesday, AMC Stubs membership be damned.

Memes make for the best viral marketing companies can ask for in the modern age. Just look at how the tongue-in-cheek M3GAN ad campaign made an outright smash out of a campy January horror movie.

It goes without saying, too, that Rinna couldn’t score a better PR move if she tried. Despite the fact she’s leaving Bravo in tatters on the heels of being booed at BravoCon, this ad would have the entire chronically online community eating out the palm of her hands. Do you know how many people have no idea there’s a human version of that iconic M&M? Time to expand that brand, Ms. Hustler.

A few million may watch the Real Housewives, sure, but who needs them when you have 200 million watching this at the Super Bowl?

Picture this: the M&M’s sit down for a Real Housewives reunion, Lisa Rinna M&M and the green M&M—the two most iconic M&M’s—hashing out their differences. Drama, stakes, M&M’s.

Or, you know what, let’s let the marketing team figure it out. I have a simple journalism degree, and here I am using it. So to the Mars marketing team, I implore you to take this baton and run with it. The concept is foolproof. You put that M&M in a commercial and watch the revenue roll in, if it’s the last thing you do. And it won’t be—you’ll all be getting promotions in no time.

Read more at The Daily Beast.

Get the Daily Beast's biggest scoops and scandals delivered right to your inbox. Sign up now.

Stay informed and gain unlimited access to the Daily Beast's unmatched reporting. Subscribe now.