Phill Casaus: Advice to this year's grads from the Class of '81
May 16—Honored graduates of the Class of 2021:
Congratulations on surviving high school and COVID-19, because as you've learned better than anyone, this was a two-for-one sale no one will ever forget.
Just wanted to say it's an honor to be here for your big day.
In a few minutes, we'll begin our ceremony. Our other guest speakers are about to flood the stadium with fine words about the places you'll go — cue obligatory Dr. Seuss reference — and I hope you're buoyed by their enthusiasm. They are very proud of you. And they should be.
In the meantime, while we wait for the band to strike up "Pomp and Circumstance" and get this party rolling, I hope you'll allow me to offer 40 pieces of advice from someone who sat in your chair exactly 40 years ago.
It's the stuff I've learned in this life since walking across that stage and grabbing the piece of paper that was my ticket to adulthood. Let's just call this "Nuggets from the Class of '81."
Hope you don't mind. It won't take long.
1. Always, always, always trust your gut. It knows.
2. It doesn't hurt to ask questions, even when they make others squirm.
3. There's no reason to ask questions if you won't listen to the answers.
4. The people you leave in high school somehow stay in your life, whether you want them to or not.
5. All forms of fashion and hairstyle eventually come back. Please take care to avoid the mullet.
6. Don't be afraid to call your mom, no matter how old you get, and even when your friends are around.
7. It's OK to ask for seconds at dinnertime. Just remember, though, after the age of 40, your seconds become integrated into your daily wardrobe.
8. There are tons of smart people in college. But a degree alone doesn't guarantee smarts.
9. When you say goodbye to a lover or a job, don't do it in a text message. Or email.
10. Your dad is smarter than he looks and worked harder than you ever knew.
11. Tell someone you appreciate their talent every day.
12. Jealousy casts a long shadow that only makes you seem smaller.
13. Five minutes early never hurt anyone, and it gave a lot of people a leg up.
14. The girl/guy you ignored in high school will never forget, and they generally got better looking.
15. Admitting you're wrong is not fatal.
16. Make damned sure you're right when you say you are.
17. Ask your parents and grandparents to tell you stories about when they were kids. Write 'em down. Videotape 'em. Your kids will thank you.
18. Make sure you come home from the graduation party in one piece.
19. Make sure you come home from any party in one piece.
20. When you find the one, you'll know. How? Because he/she will be your best friend when everyone else forgets your name.
21. When buying a car, kick the tires. When choosing a candidate at the ballot box ... same thing.
22. Go to every Little League practice, awards banquet, fundraiser and piano recital. It's a pain and the chicken is always overcooked. But these events are what you remember about your kids when they were little.
23. You become an adult at age 18. But you'll never stop growing up, so be forewarned.
24. A handwritten thank-you card is priceless. So create something valuable.
25. Volunteer for something, anything, at least once a year. You deserve to feel good about yourself.
26. As hard as it is to believe now, someday you will be proud of the high school you attended. Why? Because we all came from somewhere.
27. Write down your passwords. No one wants to hear you curse.
28. A friend with a pickup will get you through a major life crisis faster than counseling.
29. Your kid brother/sister is braver than you ever thought possible.
30. Stand up when you're introduced to someone. It's called courtesy.
31. Always read the instruction manual, especially on Christmas Eve.
32. Your car's warranty is just fine. Don't answer that call.
33. Whatever you do, surround yourself with talented people. They make you look smarter than you are.
34. When your grandkids ask you what you did during the pandemic, look 'em in the eye and say: "I washed my hands, kept my distance and wore a mask." And say it with the pride of a war hero.
35. Make sure you high-five the kid in your class who's going to the military. Yup, it's an adventure, but it's not easy.
36. It's OK to chase perfection. Just don't let it twist you in knots along the way.
37. At night, come in through the front door.
38. Remember that your kids hear everything — and repeat everything they hear.
39. Only you know what "bold" means. So do it your way.
40. Go to the reunion. Go to all the reunions. You'll be surprised at how well all of you turned out.
OK, the band's in place. The diplomas are ready. To quote the good doctor, "Your mountain is waiting ... so get on your way."
Sorry, couldn't resist.
Phill Casaus is editor of The New Mexican.
