Picking the perfect Christmas tree can be a strain, but so worth it
The Talleys got their Christmas tree. Their marriage survived.
Janine Talley, who is married to Darryl Talley, the former Buffalo Bill, shared the news on Twitter.
On Dec. 7, she tweeted: “Darryl and I are going tomorrow to pick out our Christmas tree. Thoughts and prayers are appreciated at this difficult time.”
On Dec. 8, she tweeted: “Happy to report Darryl and I were able to choose a tree and avoid retaining divorce lawyers.”
She didn’t elaborate, but that wasn’t necessary. We all have our stories of how the search for the right tree was a strain on a relationship.
I know I’m perhaps not the best Christmas tree companion. My wife, Cindy, says that I tend to brood throughout the process. (Actually, she used a stronger, but not here printable, phrase.)
Some people have eliminated the tree-search tension by going the artificial route.
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My son Ben and his wife, Alicia, have had the same artificial tree since 1998. It was a “pregnancy induced purchase, not a culmination of issues,” Ben says. Their daughter Alyssa was about to be born, and Ben and Alicia just didn’t have the energy to go get a real tree. They found an artificial one at a drug store and have used it ever since.
I don’t think we’re ready for an artificial tree. And I’m proud to report that this year’s tree process went as well as it ever has.
There weren’t many trees left at J&A Farm Market in Lakeville, but we found one we liked and brought it home. Then following a tip Cindy had picked up, we laid the tree on an outside table and put on the stand before taking it in the house. We brought it in, stood it up and didn’t even have to lie on the floor to make any adjustments. It’s decorated, complete with a new Josh Allen hurdling ornament. All in all, a Christmas miracle.
So, like Janine Talley, I only have good news to pass along. We got our tree. It looks great. I didn’t even brood. Well, maybe I brooded a little bit. Old habits die hard.
On opera and the law
In his obituary of Howard Relin, the longest serving Monroe County District Attorney who died on Dec. 7 at age 81, Gary Craig of the Democrat and Chronicle noted that Relin’s first try at law school in New York City didn’t go all that well. There were several distractions, one of them being opera.
Somehow, I pictured Relin’s father, a lawyer, pleading with his son. “Howard, you’ve got to stay away from opera,” much as other parents warn their offspring against the evils of gambling.
But happily, the law would remain a part of Relin’s life without his having to give up opera.
Eventually graduating from the University of Buffalo Law School, he came home to Rochester, was an assistant Monroe County district attorney and became the district attorney in 1983.
In a 2003 Democrat and Chronicle story written upon Relin’s retirement after 20 years, Michael Zeigler reported that, while in office, Relin would sometimes close his office door and listen to opera, the volume cranked high.
Perhaps that added some relief from the stresses of a stressful job, though opera and the criminal trials do have traits in common, including accusations, passions, and dramatic endings.
Opera would seem to have helped Howard Relin navigate his successful career as a lawyer and a public servant. For all he contributed, let’s add his name to the list of Remarkable Rochesterians.
Remarkable Rochesterians
Howard Relin (1941-2022): The longest serving Monroe County District Attorney, he was appointed to that position in 1983 by Gov. Mario Cuomo and went on to be elected as a Democrat five times before retiring at the end of 2003. A native of Rochester and a graduate of Columbia University and the University of Buffalo Law School, as well as an Army veteran, he became an assistant district attorney in 1968. While district attorney, he created a victim’s assistance program, and he supported Parents of Murdered Children and many other organizations. In retirement, he taught opera at the University of Arizona’s Osher Lifelong Learning Institute. He had also taught criminal justice at Rochester Institute of Technology.
From his home in Geneseo, Livingston County, retired senior editor Jim Memmott, writes Remarkable Rochester, who we were, who we are. He can be reached at jmemmott@gannett.com or write Box 274, Geneseo, NY 14454
This article originally appeared on Rochester Democrat and Chronicle: Christmas tree search can strain relationships
