Pro-LGBTQ+ Free Mom Hugs Conference will debut in Oklahoma City

In a state where lawmakers recently passed a cluster of anti-transgender legislation, a nonprofit is hosting an event that promotes the support and celebration of the LGBTQ+ community.

Free Mom Hugs, a pro-LGBTQ+ organization started by Oklahoma City native Sara Cunningham, will host its inaugural conference Sept. 7-9 at the Oklahoma City Convention Center. Cunningham said Chasten Buttigieg, LGBTQ+ activist, husband of U.S. Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg and author of the memoir "I Have Something to Tell You," will be a special guest speaker.

Cunningham 59, famously started the Free Mom Hugs movement in 2015 when she pinned a handmade button with the words "Free Mom Hugs" to her dress and began offering hugs to people attending an Oklahoma City Pride festival. Cunning had been on a transformative journey after her son, Parker, came out as gay, and she wanted to offer the love and acceptance of a mom to LGBTQ+ community members. She soon learned that many of the people she met had been spurned by their loved ones.

Three years later, Cunningham shared a Facebook post about her experiences as a Christian mother seeking to share love and acceptance for the LGBTQ+ community in a conservative state like Oklahoma, and the post went viral. She went on to be a "stand in" mom at LGBTQ+ weddings when couples' parents refused to participate. Shortly afterward, Free Mom Hugs was established as a nonprofit, and there are currently chapters in all 50 states and in some countries around the globe.

Why is the Free Mom Hugs conference being held in Oklahoma?

Cunningham said conference organizers initially experienced some internal pushback about holding the inaugural conference in Oklahoma because of the anti-trans legislation that was passed by the Oklahoma Legislature in the most recent legislative session. She also said Oklahoma is not generally known as an affirming or accepting place for people who identify as LGBTQ+.

"But this is exactly where we need to be and exactly where this type of conference should be," she said. "It's the political climate, the urgency. There are 28 states where families are challenged, where our people are being thrown out of housing, health care and public spaces."

Cunningham said she remembered when she was not accepting of her gay son and how some people in her Christian circle told her that he was destined for hell and she would be, too, if she accepted him. She wrote about her internal struggle in her book "How We Sleep At Night: A Mother's Memoir."

"I was frozen in that place of fear and ignorance, shaming my child and causing harm, with the very best of intentions," she said. "What I would have done to have a mom like me now — to know that I was not alone."

Cunningham said it took being educated in the science surrounding LGBTQ+ issues, getting to know the people who make up the community and seeing her son happy and healthy that led her to where she is today. So, she said Oklahoma City is the right place for the Free Mom Hugs Conference because it's where she is from, where the nonprofit is based and because she knows there are parents and other individuals who need to hear the Free Mom Hugs message.

"It just means so much to have the conference in the Heartland," she said.

Meanwhile, Cunningham said the time seemed right for the nonprofit to hold its debut conference.

"We've got visibility down — we go to Pride festivals, banquets, national Pride Rides and other events, but this will accomplish what we haven't done a lot of and that's the educational aspect, which is part of our mission," she said.

Cunningham said the conference theme is "Love Revolution," which is meaningful because it was education and love that helped transform her heart for her son and so many other people who now embrace the Free Mom Hugs message of love and acceptance.

"These were the aspects that changed my mind," she said. "I know the power of ignorance and fear, but I also know of love and education, and that's the key."

Cunningham said the overwhelming response to the conference tells its own story. She said organizers' original goal was 250 people, but they have already had to move the event to a larger venue and an estimated 400 people are expected to attend.

More: 'From church to Pride festivals' Mother's book shares her journey to acceptance

Oklahoma pastors will share message at conference

The Rev. Mitch Randall, of Norman, will lead a pastors' panel during the conference. Randall, a member of the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship, a moderate Baptist denomination, and chief executive officer of Good Faith Media, said he and other ministers who will be part of a pastors' conversation are excited to be part of the first Free Mom Hugs Conference because the organization is "stepping into the gap" for LGBTQ+ community members whose parents have not been accepting of them.

He said the panel conversation will be important, particularly in Oklahoma.

"It's important to demonstrate that it's not in spite of our faith that we are welcoming and affirming but because of our faith," Randall said. "We need more pastors being vocal about that."

He said the faith discussion will be key because there are many Christians sitting in the pews of churches, particularly in Oklahoma churches, who struggle to reconcile what they hear from the pulpit and what they feel in their hearts for their children and the LGBTQ+ community as a whole.

"The easy route is to avoid these hard conversations in these difficult places like Oklahoma," the minister said.

"The hard work is to communicate to people of faith in Oklahoma and the rest of the country that not everyone believes like the pastors and legislators who are not welcoming. We need to show them that there are people of faith in Oklahoma who are welcoming and affirming to people in the LGBTQ community."

Free Mom Hugs Conference

• When: Sept. 7-9.

• Where: Oklahoma City Convention Center, 100 Mick Cornett Dr.

• Cost: Virtual pass/in-person passes range from $50 to $159.

• Information: https://freemomhugs.org/.

This article originally appeared on Oklahoman: Free Mom Hugs to hold inaugural conference in Oklahoma City