From prom queen to drag queen, Esme is honing her art one Phoenix strip-mall bingo night at a time

On a recent Saturday night, as Esme Nichols was preparing for her fourth-ever gig as a drag queen, disaster struck.

She had applied a heavy layer of foundation and powder to her face, accentuated with shimmering eye shadow, dramatic black liner, and lipstick that was an arresting shade of purple.

But as Esme went to put on her wig, a blonde number vaguely reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe, it scraped the makeup clean off her forehead.

What to do? She had no choice but to reapply.

The mishap delayed her entrance at Playa II, a beach-themed bar just off State Route 51 that shares a strip mall with a gun store and a tropical fish aquarium.

When Esme arrives, her makeup looks almost flawless, the only blemish a small patch on her forehead affected by a common enemy this time of year: sweat.

"It's not my best work," she says dryly, as she poses for photos in the oppressive evening heat, waiting for the night's featured attraction: Drag Bingo.

Esme is an 18-year-old drag queen-in-training. Her goal in life is to make a living out of drag, to sashay and lip sync and throw shade with the best of them.

Fresh out of high school, in the afterglow of prom glory and undeterred by the recent backlash against drag queens, Esme is now learning the art of drag. It’s a craft, one she is still perfecting.

Inside Playa II, where colorful string lights illuminate an eclectic collection of ocean decor, she lists the elements she has to master: make-up, costume, hair, stage presence, personality. As she speaks, she punctuates each item with a slap of her folded fan against her hand.

"Confidence isn't the issue," she adds, confidently. "But the skill of actually getting into drag? That's definitely improving."

With makeup and costume ready, some performers slip into their stage persona, their drag personality, their sassy stage name. Not Esme, whose only change is switching out Nichols for Adore.

"Honestly, the only difference I see between me in and out of drag is a wig," Esme says. "That's why I don't have a drag name, a drag persona. I'm just kind of me."

She unfolds her fan and flutters it against her face, revealing a word printed across the arc in block letters: SLAY.

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Finding a role model who modeled her roles

Esme discovered her love for drag not long after COVID hit.

Stuck at home, scrolling social media, she saw so many memes about the reality TV show "RuPaul's Drag Race" that she decided to watch it. As she binged the seasons with her younger sibling, the thought hit her: "This is what I want to do with my life."

She was drawn to the world of drag, glamorous and attention-grabbing and fun.

"This idea that I could just wear cool costumes, go out on stage and be myself," Esme said. "I was like, that seems awesome. I need to get in on that."

She can already name drag idols: Trixie Mattel, who appeared on Season 7 of "Drag Race," and Adore Delano, runner-up in Season 6.

She had looked up to Delano since seeing her on the show, Esme said. But this past July, when Delano made an emotional announcement on her Instagram, Esme discovered they had something other than a love of drag in common.

Delano is a transgender woman.

So is Esme.

Esme started exploring drag around the same time she was coming out as trans. Her mother and stepdad didn't accept her, she said, and two years ago, she moved in full-time with her father.

"The second I lived with my dad, and I was able to, I started being myself," Esme said.

Her dad, whose name is Boomer, joined in the "Drag Race" viewings. Together, they also watched "Pose," an acclaimed series about New York City ball culture that features several transgender actors.

"So I kind of got an education through that," Boomer said.

It was clear to him from when Esme was very young that she was different, he said, and he had assumed he would have a gay son. Instead, she came out as transgender.

"It wasn't a far leap," he said.

The new name and pronouns were an adjustment, Boomer added. But overall, it seemed like a natural transition for the child he had always known.

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'Just happy to be here' and learn the gig

Esme weaves her way around high-top tables, displaying a small white board to the patrons of Playa II.

On the board, a sample sheet shows the pattern people must cross off before they can call “Bingo!” It changes every round, from a diagonal line, to a cross, to the letter "E".

After showing the white board to those seated at one end of Playa II, Esme walks the length of the bar, past patrons switching their gaze between bingo sheets and a Diamondbacks game, and displays it to the other half of the players.

Then she spins on her heels — fluffy black stilettos, to match her black sequined bodice and feather boa — and heads back to where she started. Then she does it again. And again. Up and back.

This is Esme's job at Drag Bingo.

The monthly event is hosted by Barbra Seville, a Phoenix drag icon who does regular gigs around the city. Barbra made headlines during the 2022 election for calling out Republican gubernatorial candidate Kari Lake for her hypocritical public statements about drag queens.

Barbra roams the bar, completely at ease as she calls bingo numbers and entertains with a seemingly effortless pattern, the commentary ranging from dirty jokes to personal anecdotes to pop culture references.

Occasionally, she wields a white board too. "You work that side, I'll work this side," she tells Esme as a new round starts. Esme nods, grabs her board, and immediately heads down to the other end of the bar.

Whenever a winner is called, Esme holds out a metal bucket so they can select a number that corresponds with a selection of prizes. But mostly, it's white board duty. In between laps, she sustains herself with pieces of Laffy Taffy from an enormous bag Barbra brought.

She performs her tasks with poise and focus, eager to contribute in any small way she can. It's Barbra's show, she says. "I'm just happy to be here."

At a table in the corner sits her dad, surrounded by a large group of friends. It's his second drag-related outing of the day: That morning, he took Esme to a drag brunch downtown, also hosted by Barbra.

"We go as often as we can," Boomer says.

He is also a performer, a stand-up comic who has been doing shows in Phoenix for more than 20 years, and whose connections have come in handy as Esme pursues her passion. He used to tend bar with Sandi Zerlaut, who owns Playa II. When he saw she had booked Barbra for Drag Bingo, he asked if Esme and Barbra could meet. That's how Esme ended up helping out once a month, though she's not yet 21.

Through her dad's eyes, Esme has grown in skill and confidence with each show.

"Tonight her drag is way more sophisticated than it has been in the past," he says, as he watches her pass by with the bingo board. In recent months, buoyed by the chance to perform drag in public, she has improved the execution of her makeup, added features to her costume.

"I'm very proud of her," he adds.

She's enrolling in drag queen boot camp

Because drag is so unique to the performer, Esme said, it is best learned through experimentation.

"There's not really a 10-step program to be a drag queen," she said.

What she knows, she learned through trial and error, approaching the task with the peculiar mix of humility and confidence that a drag queen-in-training must possess.

"Obviously, I know like the basic steps that I'm supposed to take, but I'm not someone who does research on things or listens to other people's advice very often," she said.

"So it's like, I know 'glue down your brows' is a step, but I'm not going to watch someone else do that and learn how to do it. I'm just going to figure it out."

Is there anything she feels like she's mastered?

"Absolutely not," Esme said. "I have been doing drag for, like, less than a year at this point. I have a long way to go."

OK, on reflection, there is one thing.

The parts of drag that might terrify a shyer soul — being the center of attention, commanding a crowd, keeping up a witty commentary — don't bother Esme.

"This sounds really cocky, but that's something I know I can do," she says. "I guess that's the part that I'm confident in, in my drag. The personality is there. The stage presence, the confidence, I think I'm there with."

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Coming of age amid anti-drag, anti-trans activity

It's a confidence she had needed in recent years.

At her north Phoenix high school, Esme said, most kids either accepted her as transgender or didn't care, but a vocal minority made clear they didn't like it. She kept her head up and her shoulders back and at the end of her senior year wore the crown of Prom Queen.

Her last few years of high school and fledgling drag career also coincided with a torrent of LGBTQ legislation sweeping across the country, much of it aimed at transgender people and drag queens.

Esme falls into both categories. Has she found it hard?

"I wouldn't say it's something that I devote a lot of my time to looking into in depth," she said. "But as a young trans person in America, obviously it's something that you can't avoid. It's everywhere."

A particularly virulent hatred is reserved for transgender women, she said, pointing out that trans men are often painted as misguided people who were failed by society, while trans women are tarred as predators.

Occasionally, it gets to her.

But after experiencing the heartbreak of family rejection and the joy of living as her authentic self, she has learned to shake off the prejudices of people she doesn't know.

"Mary Sue down the street, she could live forever or die tomorrow," Esme says. "I do not care what her opinion is."

It hasn't dimmed her drag aspirations, though she can't completely put them into practice until she is 21.

"I'm in a weird purgatory limbo state right now," she said.

Since graduating high school in May, she has picked up more shifts as a cashier at Goodwill, where she puts her love of fashion to good use with customers seeking advice on what to buy.

"They're like, 'Are these cute?'" Esme said. "I'm like 'No.' If my opinions are asked for, I will give them. And I will give them honestly."

She wants to do drag for a living, but whether that will manifest, Esme isn't sure. She would love to be on "RuPaul's Drag Race." Her Plan B is beauty school.

"You have to get popular enough in local scenes to be able to have constant bookings and be making money," she said. "I don't know how realistic it is, because I haven't gotten into that life yet. But that is definitely something I would love to live."

In the meantime, between Goodwill shifts, Esme is working hard to improve her drag skills.

"You see people go to law school all the time," she said. "I'm trying to go to Barbra Seville's drag queen boot camp."

When she turns 21, and can go to bars without her dad, she wants to hit the ground running.

But for now, she's delighted to carry the bingo board at Playa II, trooping up and down the bar until her feet hurt, hoping one day to land a gig of her own.

Lane Sainty writes about people, places and events across Arizona. Reach her at lane.sainty@arizonarepublic.com.

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This article originally appeared on Arizona Republic: Meet Esme, a Phoenix teenage drag queen in training