Pursuing a rebate by mail? You better believe it
I once ordered flower seeds through the mail and sold them door-to-door. I used to collect cereal box tops and sent them in for battery-powered boats that wouldn’t float or cars that sputtered and died.
When I was young, I routinely sent letters to sports teams asking for freebies. Hoping to score tickets or posters, I ended up with crappy promotional guides. But I tell you what: When that stuff came in the mail, nothing was more exciting.
As a teenager I joined the record club because it was impossible to resist. I got 12 — 12! — 8-track tapes for a buck — a buck! Of course there was some small writing that said I had to buy a certain number of 8-track tapes for the regular price over a course of time, but I pretended to ignore it. Then I couldn’t wait for that big box of listening pleasure to arrive so I can slip one of those technologically advanced devices into my combo record player-radio-8-track stereo with box speakers on each side.
Nowadays, it’s Amazon boxes. And while their arrival isn’t as hotly anticipated as when I was a kid, there’s still something exciting about getting cool stuff in the mail. Even my free COVID government test kits was greeted with “at least it’s not a bill from the IRS.”
So the other day, when the store cashier handed me a slip of paper and said something about a rebate, you bet I snapped it up and saved that receipt. Naturally, there was some work involved before I could get my four bucks, but I was determined.
Because I’m easily distracted, I forgot about the rebate the minute I left the store. But then I remembered it a couple days later when I stumbled across the empty carton and wondered why it wasn’t in the trash.
So I cut off the required UPC tag and spent the next 30 minutes looking for the receipt and rebate slip. Once they were luckily located, I carefully filled out all the information. I discovered that I follow directions more precisely about getting all the rules right regarding a $4 rebate than I am about filling out income taxes. I didn’t want to get anything wrong to avoid issues and getting it voided.
It took about another hour to correctly decipher the tiny writing, but I was determined. I looked at it carefully to make sure there were no errors. I even highlighted the purchase and the date on the receipt to show the multibillion-dollar company that I was following all the rules.
In reality, it’s kind of dumb. The entire process took over an hour, which amounts to about $2 an hour, not including the 50-cent stamp or whatever they cost these days. But that’s not the point. The point is, it’s free money. It won’t even buy the gallon of gas I’ll use to drive to the post office, but it doesn't matter.
In the end, the rebate will end up as a check in the mail. And that's way better than all the junk I get. It's even better than flower seeds.
Ray Kisonas is the regional editor of The Monroe News and The Daily Telegram. He can be reached at rayk@monroenews.com.
This article originally appeared on The Monroe News: Ray Kisonas: Pursuing a rebate by mail? You better believe it
