The Salmon Cannon Is Taking Everyone for a Joy Ride in a Very Efficient Fish Tube
The recent re-discovery online of an old video of a salmon cannon transporting migratory salmon between bodies of water is Internet gold and people want in.
“This salmon cannon transports the fish between bodies of water,” Cheddar tweeted last week.
This salmon cannon transports the fish between bodies of water. (Via @CheddarGadgets)https://t.co/2eFQceFgzv pic.twitter.com/AHK0QJMCKf
— Cheddar (@cheddar) August 7, 2019
The pressurized “fish tube” as it called is the environmentally-friendly brainchild of a company appropriately called Whooshh Innovations. Dams can block migration for salmon who need to get where they’re going, but this contraption transports live salmon through the tube and over dams in order to significantly cut down their travel time.
Witness the Whoosh salmon cannon below.
The company’s site explained the genesis of the salmon cannon thusly:
The company explains it thusly.
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Even though the innovation dates back to 2011 and this particular viral fish tube video is from 2014, the Internet couldn’t stop marveling at it as it is wont to do when it comes to matters involving salmon shooting around.
Elon Musk has finally had his hyperloop dreams come true. https://t.co/JwSOIoiRsm
— Hank Green (@hankgreen) August 11, 2019
We now live in a world that has a salmon cannon pic.twitter.com/PHskeL0doo
— Wes Blankenship (@Wes_nship) August 11, 2019
what if we kissed in the salmon cannon 😳 pic.twitter.com/eS4tbzsaVg
— 🍒 (@kirikerise) August 11, 2019
Scientists: this salmon cannon will help restore migratory patterns and safely transport farmed fish
The salmon: pic.twitter.com/EKegYaAMnH— Lauren Simonitis (@OceanExplauren) August 12, 2019
the scene in apollo 11 where the nasa dorks dump all the parts on the desk, but it's the terms "fish tube," "yeet," "cousin greg," "knife-balloon man" and "wig" and they all got fit into one tweet
— brian feldman (@bafeldman) August 12, 2019
🎶Take me to the river🎶
🎶Launch me through the fish tube 🎶— Patrick Sullivan (@PatchNavillus) August 12, 2019
[me appearing on Shark Tank with my million dollar idea]
Salmon waterslide cannon https://t.co/XFxHauHffY— Josh Butler (@JoshButler) August 11, 2019
We. Demand. To. Ride. The Fish Tube.
— Ariel Dumas (@ArielDumas) August 11, 2019
the salmon going through the giant fish tube: pic.twitter.com/UtIC7EKuc6
— Paul McCallion (@OrangePaulp) August 11, 2019
I just wanna be rich enough to travel everywhere by salmon cannon. pic.twitter.com/ngvcVVolo3
— peanut (@angrypeanut4) August 11, 2019
Wish I knew why everyone is calling it a fish tube when it's clearly a salmon cannon. #fishtube #Salmoncannon pic.twitter.com/fn27Vu4UYV
— Timm Neeley (@TimmNeeley) August 11, 2019
Pop me in the salmon cannon and fire me all the way to Reading
— Adam Hann (@1975hann) August 12, 2019
Everyone sharing the salmon cannon, you ain’t seen nothin: pic.twitter.com/XWf4iJdu5H
— Tyler Reinhard (@abolishme) August 11, 2019
Anybody got any red string I can use to connect Epstein's death to the salmon cannon? It's gonna take a lot of string. #FishTubeConspiracy
— Ben Acker (@bnacker) August 12, 2019
the salmon going through the giant fish tube: pic.twitter.com/UtIC7EKuc6
— Paul McCallion (@OrangePaulp) August 11, 2019
good morning yeet me through the fish tube
— JuanPa (@jpbrammer) August 11, 2019
Welcome...to the world of tomorrow! pic.twitter.com/y2XEkUKIq0
— Mark (@Mark55____) August 11, 2019
someone make a gofundme for a human-sized version of the fish tube please
— Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) August 11, 2019
My housemate: so how was your day
Me: sorry can you just give me a moment [spends 15 minutes thinking how to try to explain salmon cannon, without sounding crazy, to a person who doesn’t have twitter]— Josh Butler (@JoshButler) August 11, 2019
what if the fish was frank reynolds pic.twitter.com/ubcNT3qc81
— unlicensed professional (@KrangTNelson) August 12, 2019
It even got the Super Mario 64 edit.
Fixed the audio for you. pic.twitter.com/YvvTm9WEcb
— Tuft e. Cake (@Tuftecake) August 11, 2019
It even showed up on Last Week Tonight back in 2014. And John Oliver doesn’t just talk about anything.
It may make the journey more efficient for salmon, but this tube cannot accommodate humans as people were quick to point out.
Try a water slide instead.
