San Diego's Mayor Makes John Oliver Want to Drink Hand Sanitizer
As Anthony Weiner goes down with his sinking ship following his Communications Manager's expressive interview, The Daily Show notes there's still one politician out there who is worse: San Diego's mayor, Bob Filner. "We've been covering [Weiner's mayoral bid] a lot, because we live here in New York," John Oliver said. "But please, please know that it's not like we don't care about other cities' elected perverts, too."
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Oliver broke out the Eww-O-Meter to measure just how gross and creepy the allegations against the mayor are. Warning: they're pretty bad. "Get ready to apologize to your skin for what it's about to hear," Oliver said. "Because it's not just going to crawl, it's going to spider walk across the ceiling like Linda Blair in The Exorcist." Eight different women have come forward accusing Filner of groping, sexually assaulting and/or slobbering on their faces. "Say what you will about Anthony Weiner. At least his texts don't leave a physical residue on your face." After one woman revealed that Filner asked her to work without underwear, the Eww-O-Meter exploded and Oliver started guzzling hand sanitizer.
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And while these are all currently just allegations, Filner is definitely guilty of thinking two weeks of therapy is as good as just plain quitting. "You're coming back?" Oliver asked. "After two weeks? Your fitness for office problem is not that you need to lose five pounds, it's that you need to lose your entire personality." That's one thing that Weiner and Filner have in common — they're not quitters, unfortunately.
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