Shelley Terry: A look ahead at our retirement plan

May 7—A few months ago, my father and his wife moved into a retirement community on Florida's southwest coast.

They live in one of about 800 mobile homes and own one of about 800 golf carts. That's right — 800 golf carts.

Nobody walks any more.

During a recent visit, I discovered you must have a golf cart if you want to be in the senior "in crowd."

I found this reassuring, as my eyes and ears don't work as good as they once did.

Now I know, if there comes a time when I can't drive a car, I can travel by golf cart. I'll just stick a slow-moving vehicle sign on the back and go. (Don't laugh. Remember the old guy who drove his tractor cross-country to visit his brother? Desperate times call for desperate actions!)

Yes, faithful readers, I got a glimpse of Hubby and I's not-so-distant future, filled with simple, daily retirement-style activities.

Let me take you through what I now believe will be a typical day: We get up at 6 a.m., have oatmeal, toast and coffee for breakfast.

We then shower and change.

In an attempt to lose a little weight (not a lot of weight, in case I get sick I'll have something to fall back on), I will drive the golf cart to the pool for what I like to call "whales in water" class.

I'm thankful Hubby will take his boat and go fishing most days, rather than sit around the house and comment or make suggestions about everything I do.

After my water exercise class, I will don my "What happens at Grandma's house, stays at Grandma's house" T-shirt, my white capris and velcro-strapped tennis shoes and drive to the clubhouse for a rousing game of bingo.

Before I know it, it will be time for lunch. It will take me a good 10 minutes to get in the car because my legs are stiff and I'm very short.

Lucky for me, Florida has the largest population of seniors under five feet tall, so everyone understands why I sit on a cushion to see over the steering wheel.

Next I will put on my wrap-around sunglasses and slowly and carefully drive to Publix, most likely with my right turn signal on.

Once inside, I will partake of the tasty samples dispensed by other old ladies who got bored with retirement and picked up a part-time job. Those samples are enough to hold me until dinner.

While perusing the aisles, I may accidentally steal someone else's cart, if it looks a little like mine. I'm told this happens frequently and to just "go with the flow."

After lunch at Publix, it will take me an hour to find where I parked my car.

I'll be back home around 2:30 p.m. to get ready for dinner at the local diner. People start lining up for the early bird around 3:30 p.m., but Hubby and I will want to get there by 4 p.m. because we are late eaters.

Dinners are popular at the diner because we can take home a doggy bag for lunch tomorrow, along with an extra roll, crackers and several packets of sugar.

By 5 p.m. we will be home and sitting on the couch to watch the news and weather.

By 6 p.m., Hubby will have nodded off in his recliner and we will be in bed by 8 p.m.

Many days, our schedule will include visits to various doctors. When you're retired, I understand you have to put aside plenty of time to regularly see the family physician, the podiatrist, the urologist, the gynecologist, the dermatologist, the neurologist, the ophthalmologist and the dentist.

We also have time to listen to the oldies radio station while sitting in a long drive-through line at the drugstore. (Wait a minute! We do that now.)

Waiting for test results also is a time consuming task. Waiting for the doctor to call can take days. Luckily, I will have a free flip-phone with big buttons, courtesy of the government, so I don't have to sit by a landline all day. Instead, I can sit in my screened-in porch and wave at passersby in their golf carts.

I can't wait!

While in Florida, staff writer Shelley Terry visited her former pastor. He said at her age, she should be thinking about the hereafter. Star Beacon staff members have noticed she does this all the time. She walks into a different room and says, "Now what am I here after?" Write her at sterry@starbeacon.com.