Student who says there are 'only 2 genders' takes Exeter coach Bill Ball, SAU 16 to court

EXETER — A former Exeter High School athlete testified he was embarrassed after he was benched from playing a football game after stating his view there "are only two genders" in a text message with a classmate.

He wasn't embarrassed about that statement, nor for later calling her a "bozo" and telling her to "STFU," an acronym for "shut the (expletive) up," but because he was concerned others would think he was benched on the sidelines because of his performance.

The now 16-year-old student faced off with Bill Ball, the Exeter High School varsity football coach and athletic director, Tuesday in Rockingham Superior Court. It was the start of a trial in a lawsuit brought by his family in 2021 against SAU 16, Ball and EHS Assistant Principal Marcy Dovholuk.

The school has denied the student was benched for his beliefs on gender, stating the one-game suspension was in response to using foul language and bullying in violation of the school's Athletic Code of Conduct.

However, attorney Richard Lehmann, representing the student's family, said in opening statements that even if the student was not punished for his religious belief there are only two genders, he was still unconstitutionally punished.

The school district's Athletic Code of Conduct, Lehmann said, does not trump the student's rights to free speech, especially when the speech occurred outside of school on his cell phone.

“My client was subjected to a sanction imposed against him where he was not permitted to participate in a school activity for a day based on protected speech,” said Lehmann. “There must be a remedy and that effectively is a declaration that he (Coach Ball) was wrong without more than a (minimum) financial reward attached.”

The family is seeking $1 in nominal damages.

The school district's attorney, Michael Eaton, countered during opening statements Ball was just doing his job as an educator, which was to "respect all."

Ball told the court Tuesday his decision to bench the student was "more teaching than punitive."

“Everything at the end of the day is teaching,” Ball said. “Teaching and respecting every person that walks into this room.”

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Student tells his side of the story

The student, who now attends Central Catholic High School in Lawrence, Massachusetts, recounted the events on the stand that led to his one-game suspension.

He testified he was in Spanish class on Sept. 9, 2021, when his teacher asked each student to introduce themselves.

One of his classmates, he recalled, told the class they consider themselves non-binary and prefer to be addressed by "they" as a singular pronoun.

While he did not have an interaction with the student that day or since then, he told the court, he did bring up what occurred in the class on the bus with his friends.

He said he discussed the difficulty of using third-person pronouns to refer to themselves in Spanish because the language uses masculine and feminine nouns.

The student said a female classmate overheard what he said and confronted him by saying, "There’s more than two genders.”

He testified that he responded by saying, “No there isn’t. There’s only two genders," citing his “scientific and religious beliefs.”

The dispute escalated over text messaging later that night, he said, after the female student got his number somehow.

He said during the back and forth he recalled the classmate saying something that "made him feel stupid" and that he responded by calling her a "bozo" before telling her to “STFU."

"(She) called me stupid and I wanted to say it in a funnier way," he testified.

The next morning, the student said Ball pulled him out of his class and brought him to a room with EHS Assistant Principal Dovholuk and told him, “At Exeter, we respect people, and we respect how they identify” before handing down a week-long suspension from the team. The student said later that day Ball told him during lunch he would only be suspended for one game.

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Coach Ball takes the stand to defend actions

In his testimony, Ball denied saying, "We respect people, and we respect how they identify.”

He said he told the student, “We respect all.”

Ball said he and Dovholuk showed the student an email sent by a classmate with screenshots of their text messages from the prior day.

He recalled receiving an email with the text messages attached at 7:33 a.m. that morning and forwarded it to Dovholuk.

Ball said upon reading the text exchange, he “was concerned about both students.”

“The dialogue wasn’t in the best interest of both students,” he said on the stand. “(The student) told her to ‘Shut the f--- up, that’s unacceptable.”

In more than four decades of experience as an educator, Ball said, he has always been concerned when there’s student-to-student aggression. He wanted to “help both students” because “that’s my job.”

The school's Athletic Code of Conduct states a violation occurs if “action inside or outside of the school environment brings dishonor or discredit to the school or athletic team.”

Ball testified over the years many football players have been suspended from both practice and games due to negative behaviors.

“The student's benching for that one game was, in my mind, being preventative,” he said. “In that whole class, I don’t think I had a better relationship with anyone other than (that student).”

The bench trial was set to continue Wednesday, Nov. 29.

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Lawsuit initially filed to halt the school's gender policy

The lawsuit was initially filed in November 2021, seeking a preliminary injunction to prohibit future enforcement of the school district's transgender and gender nonconforming policy.

However, Rockingham Superior Court Judge David Ruoff granted the school's motion to dismiss the student's request for an injunction.

The judge noted the policy in question is for staff, not students, and only "sets out guidelines for schools and district staff to address the needs of transgender and gender nonconforming students."

Under the policy, a “student has the right to be addressed by a name and pronoun that corresponds to the student’s gender identity.” It also contains a provision that states, “the intentional or persistent refusal to respect a student's gender identity … is a violation of this policy.”

The judge noted the policy does not contain an enforcement mechanism.

However, the judge stated the case for "nominal damages" arising from being benched for one football game in violation of his freedom of speech could proceed to trial.

This article originally appeared on Portsmouth Herald: Student who says 'only two genders' takes Exeter coach to court