Can we talk menopause at SXSW? Actress Judy Greer, TV star Stacy London say: Yes, we must
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"I am Judy Greer. I'm an actress. And I'm aging."
That's how actress Judy Greer, the star of the Hulu series "Reboot," opened the SXSW panel on perimenopause and menopause Saturday afternoon.
Her co-panelists continued the theme:
"I am Stacy London and I am also aging," said the TV star best know for the show "What Not to Wear."
Tracy Gray, the third panelist for "Embrace the Change: Flipping the Script on Aging," is the founder of The 22 Fund, which seeks to put investment money into the hands of women and people of color around the world. She also said she is aging, but on the theme of reframing how we think about aging, she said she's turning 60 this year, which she likes to think of as turning "sexty."
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Greer is the founder of Wile, a company that sells supplements to deal with the symptoms of perimenopause and menopause. London was the CEO of State of Menopause, a company that sold beauty products to women experiencing menopause. She is working on a new endeavor in this space, but didn't share details.
Moderator Samantha Leal, a lifestyle journalist for publications like Glamour, Real Simple and the Atlantic, opened the session with this: Menopause is the single most overlooked medical issue and 85 percent of women have symptoms.
What does menopause look like?
Menopause is more than just hot flashes and vaginal dryness, which are the most recognized symptoms, they said. It is also fatigue, joint pain, insomnia, mood changes, anxiety and depression, headaches, tingling in the arms and legs, brain fog, memory lapses, thinning hair and brittle nails, weight gain and more.
Greer, 47, said turning 40 was particularly hard on her. "One day I am a girl or a girl's best friend, the next day I am the mom, asked to play roles where the children were a few years younger than me," she said of her acting career.
"Why can't the mom be as relevant as the girl or the girl's best friend in Hollywood?" London asks. "We value the wrong things."
Greer found perimenopause, the run up to menopause, as "isolating." "I would walk into a party and not know anyone's names. I wouldn't want to talk to anyone," she said. "... I'm pretty (expletive) smart. I felt dumb."
London, 53, describes her menopause story as a time in her life where she was "hot flashing, crying, screaming," and she didn't know what was wrong with her.
"I didn't look like myself," London said. "I didn't feel like myself."
A history of not talking about menopause
Greer remembers her mother standing on the balcony of their home in Michigan during the winter in her underwear. When she asked what her mom was doing, she was told not to worry, that she was fine. "You were not fine," Greer told the audience. Yet her mother never talked about menopause. She also never talked about sex, either.
"My mother used to vacuum in her underwear," Gray said, but her mother never talked to Gray about what she was experiencing.
Greer said she wants to change what people think of when they hear the word menopause.
"I am starting this conversation, not only for me, but for people like me and my community," Greer said. "I just want to start the conversation."
For Gray, instead of being like her mother and not talking about why she was vacuuming in her underwear, she tells people what she's going though.
"I do a lot of public speaking," Gray said. "If I'm hot flashing, I tell people."
Is aging bad?
Nope, It's happening to everyone. Women spend half of their lives in menopause or post-menopause.
"This stage of life is related to changes. You're looking at a culture that says, 'you don't matter anymore,'" London said.
We have to create a narrative that is positive, London said.
"The first half of life is the hero's journey," London said. "The second half is the artist's way. It's something to look forward to instead of something to dread."
Why isn't more attention paid to menopause medically?
It wasn't until 1993 when Congress passed a law that required clinical trials to include women and people of color.
"Women have been ignored by the health care establishment," London said. "We need clinical trials. We are not little men."
When you add the topic of menopause to the topic of women's health, it becomes even more difficult.
Women typically get diagnosed later with diseases than men. Often doctors ignore women and their symptoms. Sometimes women are afraid to tell doctors of their symptoms.
Greer said she went to four different doctors before she found one that would listen to her and treat her symptoms. She was offered mental health medications and other remedies that weren't going to tackle menopause.
"You have to vote with your feet," London said. "If your doctor is dismissive, vote with your feet. If it's not the right doctor, find another one."
Why don't we invest in women experiencing perimenopause and menopause?
Companies are investing in women, but it's often in beauty products, clothing and other things to change outward appearance, the panelists said.
Why is that? More than 98% of venture capital is controlled by men, Gray said. "Is a man going to say, 'I'm going to invest in that menopause company'?" she asked.
"You need money to do anything. ... Men invest in beauty products because they want women to look better. I want to feel better," Gray said.
She encourages women to put their money where their values are when making purchases.
"Women need to take the power of our wallets," Gray said. "The finance industry is not about money, it's about power."
What can women do about perimenopause and menopause?
The panelists had these ideas:
Talk about your perimenopausal and menopausal symptoms with your friends and your family members, including your children, partners and your doctor.
Get educated about your body and normalize what is happening to you.
Talk to your employer about health insurance benefits that cover menopausal therapies.
Find health care providers that will listen to you and offer therapies that work for you.
Get the most out of your doctor's visits by prioritizing a list of symptoms and bringing that with you. Also voice record your visits so you can remember what was discussed. "I can't remember (expletive)," Greer said.
Invest in companies that are working in this space.
This article originally appeared on Austin American-Statesman: Judy Greer, Stacy London talk menopause at SXSW
