'The talk' about surviving encounters with police is a fact of life in America, Black parents say
For the parents of Black kids, it is simply known as “the talk,” the emotionally wrenching conversation they feel they must now have with their children based on the fact that encounters with police can turn deadly on a moment’s notice.
Video Transcript
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MICHELLE IRBY: When dealing with the police, hands on the wheel, keys on the dash. You know, make sure that your wallet and everything is where you don't have to go reaching for it.
SHERITA MCKEEVER: I put my hands on the steering wheel. And I told Xavier to make sure that he sit back, make sure that he didn't make any sudden movements.
XAVIER TURNER: So I made sure that I rolled all my windows down, let them know that there's nothing in this car that could be any danger to you or to me. If you need to look in my car, you could view everything. Everything was visible.
MICHELLE IRBY: Don't go into any examples or exaggerations or anything like that to give them any reason to question what you're doing or whatever the case may be, and just be respectful.
SHERITA MCKEEVER: Be respectful and do what you can to get home.
MICHELLE IRBY: I need you to come home safely to me.
SEQUETTE CLARK: And I had one son who would always questioned me-- which was Stephon-- well, how are you going to tell me to be like this any other way and then with the police you telling me to be a punk? Because that's they call it. That's what he said. You telling me to be a punk to the police. And I said, if that's how you going to make it home, yep. Make it home by any means necessary.
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I know that there would be no George Floyd without Stephon Clark.
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MICHELLE IRBY: I watched the video and I cried. Just hearing him cry for his mom, it just-- it really-- it was emotional. We've all witnessed a murder play out and the evidence was very damning. He absolutely murdered that man.
SHERITA MCKEEVER: Justice was served, because when you think about the due process, you have someone who committed a crime, they're arrested, they're charged, they go into a jury of their peers, and they're found guilty. To me, that's the textbook definition of justice. So I think that justice was served, but do I think it's enough? No.
ISAIAH BRANCH: I think it's been a long time coming that people have been waiting to see something like this play out. Because there's been so many instances where no one has gotten justice, when there's pretty much evidence right there of they're doing it, and there's still, like, just never been any justice served.
SEQUETTE CLARK: It had me feeling, like, at peace because now I know for a fact that my son was not slain in vain. That his blood was for nothing. His blood has helped change the course of our nation.
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The mothers, the families, the organizations, the people, the protests, the arrests. You know, there's so many different things that play a part in a movement. And so I'm just glad that we all feel a sense of victory, you know? This is a victory for us. This is a victory for all of us and so I'm just happy to be a part of it.
SHERITA MCKEEVER: I just laid the groundwork and, you know, these young men and women, they're taking off. And again, they're unafraid. They want to see justice. They're tired of the status quo. They're tired of saying that's just how things are. That does not work for them. And I think that they are definitely going to be the ones to change the world.
XAVIER TURNER: They try to take as much weapons away from us as possible-- our voice, our activism, they block our social media posts, they try to filter things that they want to see. But one thing that they can't take away is those cell phones and those videos, and that's a real weapon. A weapon that it doesn't take to kill, doesn't have bullets. We're not using it to go to work anybody, but this cell phone is our weapon.
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SEQUETTE CLARK: I have been catapulted into a space where I'm a voice for the mothers who can't speak. Or where I am the uplifter or the edifier or the encouraging sister that comes to these mothers and says I was there, but you've now become the voice of your child and it is up to you to keep them alive by repeatedly saying their names and having others say their names.
XAVIER TURNER: And I've been in, sort of, these small utopias where people are not enlightened on what the talk is. They're not enlightened on these so-called instances that could happen. And it's when you live everyday life, everything seems so for sure. We're going to wake up, we're going go to school, we're going to go to work. But we don't account for those things that we can't. So I think that's what it's really important to have the talk.
MICHELLE IRBY: I believe that they look at our children as almost adults at the age of nine or 10, and they view them as possibly a threat at that age. So I believe you should start now with the talk. I believe it does take away the Innocence of the children. Children should not be burdened with those types of things. Children should not have to worry about if I'm walking down a street and an officer may stop me that I may get in trouble for just being a child.
ISAIAH BRANCH: It's traumatic and even dehumanizing, because it's, like, you're seeing somebody that looks like you that can potentially even be someone just like someone you across the street. Just anyone. Like, they're around your age and you're seeing them getting gunned down or choked out to death by people that's meant to protect us. And there's been too many incidents in recent years where it is just someone unarmed, someone underage just dying.
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