Teaching the evils of Communism to kindergarteners to be a new Florida mandate?
News item: The Florida Legislature is advancing a bill that would require public school students to be taught about the history and evils of communism.
The instruction, guided by the creation of a Communism Education Task Force filled by Gov. Ron DeSantis appointees, will warn the children about “the increasing threat of Communism in the United States” and its “tactics.”
Under the bill, public schools are required to tailor their mandatory communism lessons in ways that are “age appropriate” for all grades starting from kindergarten.
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OK, class. It’s time to put away our blocks and gather round.
Circle time. Yes, that’s right. Take your mats out of your cubbies and have a seat on the floor near me.
No, Miranda, we’re not going to sing “The Wheels on the Bus” song. Maybe later. But for right now, we have a very special topic to discuss together.
We’re going to talk about “Communism.” Oooh. What a big word! How many of you have heard that word? Show of hands. No one?
Michael, what did I tell you about eating crayons?
Yes, Taylor, we will have some jump rope time this morning. But not right now. Now, we are talking about the very important topic called “Communism.”
Let’s say it all together. Com-you-nism. Com-you-nism.
I know. That’s such a big word. So, let’s just call it something else.
Let’s call it “Bad Sharing.”
We all know what “sharing” is. It’s when we have something that’s ours, but allow other people to use it or have it.
Here’s an example. Remember yesterday?
Liam gave Noah some of his string cheese during snack yesterday because Noah's mom forgot to pack his snack.
That’s “good” sharing,” because Liam chose to give Noah his cheese. “Bad sharing” would be if Liam is forced to share his cheese with Noah by a governing authority.
What’s that, Liam? Yes, I did suggest that you share your cheese with Noah. But I didn’t actually demand … Well, I don’t remember taking the cheese out of your hand before you said, ‘Yes.’
Agree to disagree. Let’s move on. The important thing to remember is that sharing can be very bad when it’s not your idea to share.
No, Liam. That doesn’t make me a communist!
I just thought you would have some compassion for your best friend in class by giving him a little of your string cheese when you had way more than you could eat and he had none and …
Well, I didn’t hear you say, “No!” …
For cryin’ out loud, Liam. Your Mom always packs you way too much to eat, and you had like five pieces of string cheese yesterday.
Giving one to Noah doesn’t exactly make you Mother Theresa.
No, Teresa. I’m not talking about your mommie.
OK, class. Settle down. Let’s focus. We’re straying from the subject.
One, two, three. Eyes on me.
I am not “yelling” at Liam, Lucas. I’m just explaining how communism works.
I’ll give you another example. Take the song, “Old McDonald.” You know, the guy who had a farm, e-i-e-i-oh.
Imagine if Old McDonald was told that his cow, pig, and horse didn’t belong to him anymore, but now belonged to everybody.
No, Mia, that’s not the same thing that happened to your uncle. He lost his home to foreclosure due to a loan that was in arrears.OK, quit laughing, Ethan. I did not say a bad word. I was not talking about Mia’s uncle’s butt.
Settle down. One, two, three. Eyes on me!
Let’s move beyond the sharing to address another way that communism is evil. Imagine, class, if you lived under a set of rules that took away all your freedom to be who you are.
We are so blessed to be living in a country that allows freedom of expression. But if we were living under communism, we would be told what we could and could not say. That’s evil.
Yes, Chandler, you have a question … Um, er … no, not like Mr. Johnson, the art teacher. He should have known not to have a rainbow flag on his desk. That’s different.
Please, put your hand down, Sophia. If this is going to be something again about your two Moms, I don’t think this is an appropriate time for this.
One, two, three. Eyes on me.
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The important thing to remember is that we live in a free and wonderful country and we can’t let “bad sharing” turn us into communists.
OK, I think we’ve covered this important topic long enough for one day. Let’s move on. Yay!
It’s time for us all to read a book aloud together. Anybody have a request?
Sorry, Sarah. That book we liked about the three penguins has been taken away by the Moms for Liberty.
Frank Cerabino is a news columnist with The Palm Beach Post, part of the USA Today network.
This article originally appeared on Palm Beach Post: Florida lawmakers want kindergarteners to be taught evils of Communism
