Technology helps keep the dearly departed nearby

Aug. 10—For centuries, tombstones and mausoleums were about the only long-lasting tributes people could give their dearly departed.

These days, however, technology and creativity have created new options for memorializing those who have passed on with an array of artifacts that keep the memory of a loved one close to the heart. Really close, as in tattoos with ink that's been injected with cremains.

Much of this sea change in how loved ones can be memorialized has been triggered by the growing acceptance of cremation, according to Elisa Krcilek, vice president of Mountain View Funeral Home and Cemetery in Mesa.

"The sky's the limit when it comes to ways to hold and carry cremated remains with you," said Krcilek, who has seen it — and delivered it — all in an industry where she's worn many caps over 30 years as a licensed funeral director, embalmer, cremationist, pre-need sales and cemetery specialist.

Converting the remains of mom, dad or whoever into stones that can be carried in a pocket or purse became a big thing not long ago.

A company called Parting Stone developed a method of compressing cremains into stones.

"People who carry comfort stones in their pocket use them as a technique of calming themselves," Krcilek said. "Parting Stones are very smooth and soothing to the touch, people often carry them in their pocket, and hold or rub them for comfort."

For a while, families could buy a stone for $795, but after the company got national exposure on the "Shark Tank" television show, the price nearly doubled.

"When the stones first came out, they were very affordable and people were really liking the idea," Krcilek said. "Unfortunately, after they were featured on Shark Tank, the price doubled and families are not spending that kind of money."

But other more affordable options abound.

"Some families don't choose cremation, but they love the idea of Parting Stone," she explained. "We now have a coin that actually has a three-dimensional image of their loved one and they can carry that with them in lieu of cremated remains."

There also is "an entire biodegradable/natural/earth friendly" line of mementoes, Krcilek added.

"Some people choose to have the cremated remains go to a naturalistic place, such as the ocean. Therefore, we have salt biodegradable urns. Maybe they are taking them to the forest where they can place the cremated remains in a biodegradable earth-friendly urn or maybe they want to plant a tree in their backyard and we offer urns that accommodate the cremated remains and a tree."

People can also opt for a necklace that contains a tiny piece of cremated remains "skillfully secured inside a beautiful pearl" with "100% accuracy ensured by having one technician handle an order from start to finish." Those start at $195.

People can even have a cast made of their dearly departed's hand or hands at a starting price of $595, "depending on how many hands are in the casting," Krcilek added.

"Hand casts capture the physical essence of a person, preserving the unique contours, lines, and wrinkles that make their hands so distinctive," she explained. "These casts serve as tangible reminders of their touch, their warmth, and their presence.

"Hand casts can be displayed in a variety of ways, from standalone sculptures to framed artworks, offering a personal and artistic tribute that conveys the individual's essence."

A related artifact is a loved one's thumbprint on a bauble that "not only serves as a physical memento but also carries the emotional significance of the individual's touch.

"Thumbprint jewelry allows us to carry a tangible reminder of our loved one wherever we go, keeping them close to our hearts," she said.

Even DNA can be stored "to preserve their genetic legacy for future generations," Krcilek added, noting that it provides "the opportunity to explore ancestry, trace genetic traits, or even recreate elements of their physical appearance.

"DNA storage bridges the gap between science and remembrance, enabling a lasting connection to the past."

There are almost endless options, Krcilek said.

"We offer every form of jewelry from a memorial glass piece where the cremated remains are blown into a beautiful piece of art, to pendants and pearls to blankets and pillows with your loved one's picture on it. We offer hand castings, and everything in between. If people have seen it or heard of it, we figure out how to get it for them," she continued, explaining:

"I am very involved with national associations of my profession, so I am always looking for new and better ways to help people memorialize.

"One thing I have learned over time is you cannot ask people if they want something, you have to show it to them and allow them to see and feel it to understand exactly what it is you're offering. People simply do not know what they don't know, and when they see something that resonates with them, they will ask more questions."

As for the last goodbye, those ceremonies also have evolved, Krcilek said.

"Themes are very popular," she explained.

Some "memorializations" see guests wearing the deceased's favorite color to the service, bringing that person's favorite cookie or food for the reception.

"Other families have passed out a recipe card with the deceased most famous dish," Krcilek said. "Some families have played a video of the deceased at their own funeral so people could see them and hear the voice."

"I remember in my early years of being a funeral director families would actually ask me if it is OK to bring a picture of the deceased to put on display," she continued.

"Today they will fill the entire chapel with pictures and memorabilia for everybody to see the wonderful life the person lived."

Not surprisingly, even tombstones have caught up with the digital age.

People can have QR codes "incorporated into headstones, providing a gateway to a rich digital archive of memories and stories of the departed," Krcilek said.

"By scanning the code with a smartphone, visitors can access photos, videos, written tributes, and anecdotes, fostering a deeper connection to the person being memorialized," she explained.

This modern twist on a traditional headstone allows for a multifaceted representation of the individual, keeping their legacy alive in the digital age."

Yet, she has found that "many people really love the idea of the QR codes, but they require a lot of time, work and energy to upload stories, pictures and memories.

"While in fact, people like to go look at them, somebody needs to have the technical skills and time to put into getting them populated."

In the long run, Krcilek advised, with all these options for wakes, funerals and mementoes, it's best not to wait until they're needed so they know how they want their loved one remembered — and how they want to remember them.

"I have a philosophy when a family comes in to make arrangements for their loved one," Krcilek said. "I ask myself three simple questions: is the inquiry legal, ethical, and feasible? If the answer to all three is yes, we figure out a way to make it happen."

Information: 480-351-4502, mountainviewfuneralhomeandcemetery.com