'Tis the season to be jolly, but for some, it's also time for reflection, loss and sorrow

This is an article I wrote four years ago, but it is worth repeating every year.

This holiday season, which includes multiple celebrations, is full of elevated emotions. All the media hype about this season is full of happiness and joy. The emphasis is always on family and friends. Everyone should be home for Christmas, right?

"Bah humbug" is an anathema this time of year. We often overlook the possibility that these holiday feelings might be negative for some people.

In contrast to the excitement of family gatherings and children playing with new toys, there are the painful memories of loved ones who are not here this year. The longer we are privileged to grow old, the fewer family and friends remain with us.

How many elders tell us that they’re the only one of their siblings left?

The loss of family and friends is a common grievance of aging Seniors. On the one hand, we are blessed to grow old, but it clearly leaves us with a smaller circle of peers and family members of origin.

It is especially poignant when those deaths happen during the holiday season. As you read obituaries this time of year, do you think how difficult the following holiday season will be?

We need to be sensitive to this conundrum. Perhaps our "Merry Christmas" and "Happy Holiday" greetings should be more thoughtful.

The most important message of the season is the communication of love and hope. Being a good listener and conscious of the fact that there can be painful memories that are surfacing would make us more sensitive and compassionate.

Especially with our Elders, the effort to consider not only their long life but acknowledge the losses along the way. Sharing those memories is often the kindest way to celebrate the true meaning of this season.

This is a time to slow down, listen and share all the sacred memories of the past. As we approach Christmas, Hanukah and a beautiful New Year, let’s be more sensitive to those who are struggling with loss.

Find Connie’s book, “Daily Cures: Wisdom for Healthy Aging,” at www.justnowoldenough.com.

This article originally appeared on Topeka Capital-Journal: Outliving loved ones can be particularly painful during holiday season