Tornado victim's daughter recalls her loss and its effects on family

ELLPORT -- Niki Schilling doesn't remember the sound of her mother's voice, her mother's touch or her smell.

She doesn't know what her favorite color was or what life would have been like if her mother had lived to see her grow into a woman and a mother herself.

Her mother, Dianne Lynn Flinner, 29, of Ellport, was one of three people who died in the 1985 tornado. Niki was 5 years old, and her brother, Bryan, was just about to turn 2.

The loss of Dianne left a void in the family -- and in Niki. Even now, 30 years later, it's not something Niki can leave behind.

"Nothing could fill that void. Nothing ever," Niki said.

She doesn't recall much about May 31, the day her mom died. She said she blocked out a lot of memories and isn't sure what exactly she remembers, what she was told by her father, Floyd Flinner, and other family members, and what she's pieced together over the years.

The evening the tornado hit, Dianne was selling lingerie at a house party on Bennetts Run Road in North Sewickley Township. It was a job she started as a way to make extra money.

Niki and Bryan were visiting their mother's friend and neighbor, Kim. They ran outside to catch balls of hail as the weather started to turn. Niki said Kim put the hail in a jar and kept it in her freezer for years. She remembers the jar.

The next thing she recalls is waking up in the morning, wearing Strawberry Shortcake pajamas. It was June 1 -- her father's birthday. Niki said she went to wish him a happy birthday, but found him crying.

She doesn't remember who told her that her mother had died. She doesn't remember what her family said or how they acted. Being so young, she and Bryan did not go to the funeral.

Dianne's family knew Carl Mosketti, another victim of the tornado. Niki said she isn't exactly sure how he was connected to her family, but Dianne's brother had to identify both of their bodies.

Floyd raised Niki and Bryan. He died in 2009 of a heart attack. Niki said he died of a broken heart. Dianne was the love of his life, she said.

"My dad spent his life by himself -- I think always searching for a new Dianne. He never found it," she said.

The years after Dianne's death weren't easy for Floyd or the children.

"Did we have good moments, did we have good times? Yeah," Niki said. "But as a whole functioning family, it was a tornado inside the house at all times."

She said she was inclined to rebel and sometimes felt left out, being the only girl in her home. Her father did remarry, but only briefly.

Floyd didn't talk to his children about their mom very often. He struggled coping with her sudden death, leaving Niki to often care for her younger brother.

She said she had to compromise what she wanted to do to help take care of Bryan. But in many ways, she loved doing that for him. She said Bryan is her best friend. After joining the military, Bryan moved to Germany, where he lives with his wife and son.

Growing up, Niki and Bryan spent a lot of time with Floyd's side of the family, who are all from the Ellwood City area. In the summers, they went to Baden to spend a week or so with Dianne's family. As far as Niki knows, her mother grew up in the house where her late grandparents lived.

While she was there, her grandparents called her Twiggy, a nickname they had bestowed on their daughter when she was little. Niki strongly resembles her mother. But that hasn't always been a good thing for her. She thinks it pained her father to see Dianne in her, a grief he never really dealt with.

"Everyone will tell you (that) you look like her, you do this like her or you do that like her," Niki said. "You don't know this stuff. People tell you this. Was she like that?"

But she'll never know for herself.

She has the photo album from her parents' wedding and covets a picture of them standing together, making funny faces.

Niki also has a note her mom wrote with their address on it, signing it "Frisky," a nickname known to depict her fun-loving and often free-spirited character.

Now, Niki has four children -- Austin, 18, Payton, 14, Logan, 13, and Trenton, 8. She lives with them, her husband, Darren, and three dogs in the same Ellport house where she grew up.

When she talks about her four children, Niki's big brown eyes fill with tears. She said her children are what give her life.

"The greatest thing in life that I could ever accomplish is being a mom -- and being a good mom," she said.

The scars the tornado left behind are part of Niki's life. They shaped her as a mother, a wife and a person. In her house, the same house her great-grandparents owned, hangs a photo of her with her mother. She said it will always hang in her house.

"I think out of all this turmoil in my life, it's made me a good mom."

Read more on the Tornado of 1985

This article originally appeared on Beaver County Times: Tornado victim's daughter recalls her loss and its effects on family