35 Funny Tweets About Fake Tan Fails

put self-tanner on my legs but forgot to put it on the tops of my feet 😍😍😍😍😍😍

— keely flaherty (@keelyflaherty) June 17, 2015

Applied self-tanner so that I don't look pale and now everyone's telling me I have dirt on my face. BUT NOT ONE PERSON SAID I LOOK PALE

— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) July 29, 2013

apparently i hold myself very tightly at night and my spray tan stains my palms. spray tanning teaches you a lot about your mental health

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) June 2, 2014

"THIS GIRL IS ON FIIIIIIIRRREEE!!!"

Oh. No, wait. She just has a really bad spray tan.

— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) February 17, 2014

Spray tans last a lot longer if you don’t take your clothes off.

— Quinn Sutherland (@ReelQuinn) December 24, 2013

When you apply self tanner for the first time. pic.twitter.com/n6j0CfYOH8

— Feral Hogs Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) April 26, 2018

there was an askreddit thread about embarrassing things you've never admitted to anyone and this one guy said when he was a teen he grabbed a random bottle of his mom's lotion and discovered a few hours later it was a self-tanner bc his dick turned orange

— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) April 5, 2018

The definition of insanity is me using self-tanner over and over and expecting different, non-orange-swirly results.

— Sarah Thyre (@SarahThyre) May 6, 2018

Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she just applied self-tanner to her legs and has to walk that way so it won't get on her clothes.

— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) June 22, 2017

I wear a lot of boob tape for the show so when you spray tan, the tan darkens the silent areas where there was tape. It doesn’t look like there is adhesive, but there is. Then it gets dark. And your boobs look insane.

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 23, 2019

Well. Sure. That spray tan looks fantastic if you were going for umpa lumpa orange.

— Dakota (@iTweetMedicated) March 4, 2014

Wondering if spray tan comes in any human colors.

— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) September 25, 2015

Orange ankles are the scarlet letter of spray tans

— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) July 16, 2013

Saw the most glorious spray tan that her orangeness made me gasp.

— Sarah Sweeney (@heysarahsweeney) November 20, 2015

I don't wanna smudge my spray tan is the new, "Sorry, not tonight, I have a headache."

— Clanopath (@Clanopath) April 12, 2014

Getting a spray tan this morning. Telling you now so you'll know why I look like a 1970's Hotpoint burnt umber appliance later.

— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) April 28, 2015

Other women using self tanner: effortlessly glowing and perfectly even color

Me using self tanner: basically a dirty cheese doodle

— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) June 24, 2017

and why can't Trump afford a spray tan that doesn't leave white rings around his eyes???

— Lauren O'Neal (@laureneoneal) November 3, 2018

I don’t know who has to hear this but don’t contour your nose with self tanner at 1 A.M.

— Jennifer McAuliffe (@JenniferJokes) April 10, 2019

What it looks like? I just got off a horse after riding 100 miles. Reality? I'm letting self tanner dry and I can't let my thighs touch.

— Brittany Gibbons (@brittanyherself) April 5, 2015

Just realized my 3yo got into the self tanner. This should be interesting and just in time for Christmas cards...

— Robin O'Bryant (@robinobryant) November 25, 2009

Spray-tans don't make you look younger, they make you mustachioed.

— Laney Griner (@laneymg) May 21, 2012

As my spray tan confirms, I seem to always hug myself in my sleep. pic.twitter.com/hO3xt0EhYu

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) July 11, 2018

I never did see a spray tan I didn't vicariously regret

— Whitney Pierson (@whitney_pierson) February 26, 2013

Note to self: read the self-tanner packaging before applying a monster dose to your entire body. If it says "Deep Bronze", walk away.

— Ree Drummond - The Pioneer Woman (@thepioneerwoman) October 22, 2009

If you don’t use self tanner by the 3rd sunny day of spring you lose your Irish citizenship

— Jennifer McAuliffe (@JenniferJokes) May 7, 2019

I guess it makes sense that a spray tan place would have a Thanksgiving special. Always a good idea to be the same color as your turkey.

— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) November 24, 2015

You could demand I take an IQ test or you could just watch me apply self-tanner and draw your own conclusions.

— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) July 14, 2017

I'm wearing an orange shirt today in honor of those who feel getting a spray tan is a good idea.

— Steve Olivas (@steveolivas) June 22, 2015

Spray tans are awesome because when people say, "Hey, did you just get back from a fun vacation?" you get to be like, "No."

— Julia Segal (@juliasegal) April 25, 2013

The only place I need a spray tan is under my watch.

— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) August 8, 2011

Now they're reporting that spray tans are hazardous to your health. This may decimate the cast of "The Bachelor."

— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) February 18, 2015

Self-tanner on a bathrobe is the new lipstick traces on a cigarette.

— Sarah Thyre (@SarahThyre) January 3, 2012

I just pumice stoned my entire body to make way for another spray tan and yeah. Don’t do it.

— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 23, 2019

It's moments like this, standing in front of a fan for 15m waiting for self-tanner to dry, where I feel like womanhood has jumped the shark.

— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) July 28, 2015