20-somethings flock to their parents' homes amid coronavirus pandemic

LARCHMONT, N.Y. – When Mythily Krishnan left her home in Mahopac, New York, in the last week of February to go to India for two months, she froze 70 dinner boxes for her husband.

She’d bought a deep freezer for the purpose and had spent most of January cooking. All her husband, Krishnan Sugavanam, a senior engineer at IBM’s T.J. Watson Research Lab, would have to do is thaw each box (with enough food for two), and zap it in the microwave.

She had no idea then that the generous proportion in each dinner box would in fact be feeding two.

In early March, as Boston became one of the initial coronavirus clusters in the U.S., her 26-year-old Cambridge, Massachusetts-based son, Jay Krishnan, decided to come home.

Most of his colleagues at IBM Watson Health, where Jay Krishnan, who works to bring AI-enabled health care products to market, had already started working from home.

“Right now, cities are highly prone to the spread of disease and suburbs are a good place to be,” Krishnan said. “You can get fresh air and you can still do productive work.”

After graduating from Yale and earning a master’s in public health and epidemiology from Oxford University, Krishnan is now back to sleeping in his childhood bed.

And his mother couldn’t be happier.

“Knowing that Jay and his father are together gives me a lot of peace of mind,” said Mythily Krishnan via a Whatsapp message from India.

'More resources in the suburbs'

At a time when anxiety is high due to uncertainty and the fear of a growing pandemic, many adults in their 20s, especially those who are single, are returning to childhood homes, seeking the comfort and safety provided by their families, said Debby Green, a psychologist with offices in Pleasantville and Larchmont.

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“It is a phenomenon I see in my practice and my neighborhood. My patients, who now live in Brooklyn or Manhattan, have ... apartments and they feel socially isolated. They have a lot more resources in the suburbs and the ability to move around without being exposed to people and keeping their social distance,” Green said..

“By being home, these kids are also making sure their parents, many of whom are over 60, are OK.”

Hannah Stephanz, 27, hadn’t spent extended periods of time at her childhood home in Larchmont, New York since she left for Duke University after high school.

For the past four years, Stephanz, who works in sales for a solar energy company, has been living in an apartment in the East Village.

Three weeks ago, as many companies decided to have their employees work from home amid the virus outbreak, she came back to live with her mom, Rita, and her younger brother Grant, a high school senior.

“My apartment doesn't get a lot of natural light,” she said. “So, it's not the best place to be 24/7.”

She was not the only one with that idea.

Her younger sibling, Liza, 25, a second-year medical student at Columbia University, came home with her boyfriend, John, and his sister, Marion. John’s roommate, Zach, also joined them.

The five-bedroom, 4.5-bath house comfortably accommodates the current seven occupants, Rita Stephanz said.

She had stopped commuting to the city, where she works as a lawyer. There are three lawyers working from the Stephanz home now. (John and Zach are lawyers, too.)

With all these professionals working from the same space, the family was careful to make sure they had adequate internet bandwidth.

“We went and got an additional router for that,” she said.

Everyone also carved out a semi-personal space for themselves, trying to keep the kitchen and family room relatively free.

“We wanted to make sure that if someone wanted something from the kitchen that they wouldn’t have worry about interfering with someone’s call,” she said.

Another big advantage for the co-dwellers has been access to all the workout equipment at home, including a rowing machine and an indoor cycling bike. (Grant does crew in high school).

The group also tries to take a 20-minute break during the day to play basketball.

“We have a lot of group dinners and play cards,” Hannah Stephanz said. "It’s been a fun experience.”

Digging out Scrabble, Jenga

At Judy Herbst’s home in Larchmont, her son, Ryan, 27, moved from his apartment in the Hell’s Kitchen area of Manhattan.

Her dining room is now her son’s workspace. Ryan, who works in private equity, has his laptop and multiple monitors, all set up on the dining table.

“I wanted to leave the city because it felt like a breeding ground for something like this given how densely populated it is,” he said. “Now, I have the best co-worker: our family dog, Denny.”

Herbst said he considered himself lucky to have a job and to be working.

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“Otherwise, being cooped up at home with not much to do would make the days seem really long,” he said. Herbst's girlfriend left the city for the Berkshires to live with her parents.

For Judy Herbst, it’s a bit like old times.

“He’ll say, ‘Mom, what’s for dinner?'” said Herbst, who works in marketing and PR in Manhattan. “My husband and I usually eat very little, and that's probably the biggest difference. And so it's like I'm going through this menu in my head, which I haven’t done in forever.”

She said Ryan hadn’t lived at home for extended periods of time since college.

“It’s a really nice thing to happen at home," she said. "What I feel is really lovely and what's wonderful about it is that he feels comfortable and safe enough and happy enough that the house is here for him to use.”

This week, she’s also expecting her daughter, Lizzy, to come home from Wake Forest University in North Carolina.

In preparation for some family activity time, she said, she went looking for the old Jenga and Scrabble boxes, only to find they were missing pieces.

“So I'm like, why have I held onto these for so long when I don't have all the letters and I'm missing all these Jenga blocks?” Herbst said. “So, actually, I ordered a few new games.”

For Mythily Krishnan, who is currently in Madurai, India, things have not gone according to plan.

She had made the trip to lend a hand at a school founded by her mother-in-law during its busiest time, when annual performances and other events fill the calendar. Then two weeks ago, all the schools were shut down amid the pandemic.

On the brighter side, she's glad she could be there for her mother-in-law, who has health issues and limited mobility. After India instituted a three-week nationwide lockdown on March 24, the 82-year-old would not have had any help.

And back in Mahopac, between playing ping-pong and debating new ideas for patent collaborations at IBM, the father-son duo haven’t had to worry about food.

Jay Krishnan said he was having fun hanging out with his father.

“I wish my mom was here, too," he said. "It would have been a great bonding experience. I think it really encourages good family time. The convention is, after you graduate, you move away and so you don't get to spend as much time. I think I have a very unique opportunity here, where I can have some great time with my dad, but also work on something with him.”

Follow Swapna Venugopal Ramaswamy on Twitter: @SwapnaVenugopal

This article originally appeared on Rockland/Westchester Journal News: Coronavirus sends young adult kids back to parents' homes