University of Florida faction didn't have money or sense when it came to Jaden Rashada

Before we get to the pressing matter of Madonna’s new face, let’s deal with something that could really use a Brazilian butt lift. Perhaps you’ve heard of the Gator Collective and the Gator Guard, which help fund and operate Florida’s NIL operation.

It’s become apparent there’s a subset, the Gator Goofballs. These folks helped put the F in the Jaden Rashada Fiasco.

Sorry to bring up that sore spot, but details have started to emerge about how the rocky divorce between UF and its top quarterback recruit went down. Many came from a story last week in The Athletic, which got a copy of the $13.8 million contract Rashada signed with UF’s collective.

(At this point, you might be asking, “Isn’t there some rule against offering a recruit 13 million bucks?” Please, that’s so 2019).

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A lot of people contributed to the 12-egg omelet on Florida’s face. Like the guys who run the agency Rashada hired to represent him.

They’re an SMU sophomore and a 22-year-old real estate salesman. They may be uber-agents in the making, but Jerry Maguire’s poodle would never let a team insert the termination clause UF’s collective got in the contract.

It could back out with no strings attached, leaving Rashada high and dry. That’s pretty much what happened when the Goofball’s plan went sideways.

They said they’d pony up the $13.8 mil. Even in the murky NIL world where dollar figures are exaggerated, that would be like paying $1,000 to buy a Rolex from a sidewalk salesman in Times Square.

Check that. It was like promising to buy a shiny QB object and not coming up with the money to do it.

Maybe they got a call from Billy Napier saying he could buy six linebackers, four receivers and a backup trainer for $13.8 million. The collective’s just lucky Rashada’s representatives agreed to that termination clause, or this could have turned into a legal mushroom cloud.

There are a lot of lessons for everybody involved in the fiasco. The biggest for UF is to rein in the Goofballs, or you’ll never get that egg off your face …

Stud of the Week: Florida Football? Yep, four ex-Gators (Tommy Townsend, Kadarius Toney, Carlos Dunlap and La’Mical Perine) won Super Bowl rings Sunday. That was at least two more than any other SEC school. Hey, UF fans will take joy anywhere they can find it these days.

Dud of the Week: The Super Bowl turf. With an unlimited agronomy budget, the NFL somehow managed to make the grass more slippery than the ice at the NHL All-Star Game. …

Dud II: Russell Wilson. USA Today reported his “Why Not You Foundation” spent 24.3 cents of every dollar raised in 2020 and 2021 on charitable activities. The rest went to salaries and employee benefits. In his defense, 24 cents on the dollar is still a better return than the Broncos got out of Wilson and his $242 million contract last season. …

Dud III: The Fox football panel. Terry Bradshaw, Michael Strahan, Howie Long, Jimmy Johnson, Sean Payton and Rob Gronkowski all predicted the Eagles would win. And none predicted Rihanna would be pregnant. …

Facelift of the Week: With all due respect to Phoenix trading for Kevin Durant and the Lakers unloading Russell Westbrook, the winner was Madonna at the Grammy’s. She was immediately presented the Lifetime Achievement in Plastic Surgery Award previously given only to Michael Jackson and Cher. …

One day after Brian Kelly filed for a divorce last week, LSU’s Board of Supervisors approved naming a room at the school’s football center “The Kelly Room to honor coach Brian Kelly and his wife Paqui …” It was the worst timing since USC opened the O.J. Simpson Knife and Glove Exhibit a day after he was framed for killing his wife. …

Interview with the Vampire

After a source told ESPN that Russell Westbrook was a “vampire” in the Lakers locker room, Westbrook’s wife, Nina, said in all seriousness, “I guess I will have to prepare myself to explain to my 5-year-old that his dad is not actually a vampire.”

Parenting tip: If you have to assure your kid that his dad is not a vampire, it might be time to stop taking family vacations to Transylvania. …

Super Bowl 57 was the first to have a separate Black national anthem performed. Commissioner Roger Goodell said it went so well, the NFL is considering separate water fountains at next year’s Super Bowl …

Gator Glory II: Toney’s 65-yard Super Bowl punt return was seen by more people worldwide than Georgia’s playoff win over TCU. …

Wilson Redux: Coach Sean Payton said Wilson’s personal QB coach and trainer will no longer have access to the Broncos’ football facility. Wilson’s personal accountant will also be barred from the team’s Actuarial Department. …

This Just In: The Fox panel has predicted Florida will win the NCAA basketball tournament. ...

Amid cries of nepotism, Iowa reworked the contract of beleaguered offensive coordinator Brian Ferentz. He will get a $112,500 bonus if the Hawkeyes average 25 points, win seven games or he is still the son of head coach Kirk Ferentz at the end of the season. …

NIL News: After hearing testimony from NCAA Enforcement Chief Kato Kaelin, the O.J. jury has ruled that boosters offering kids $13.8 million to play at their school is not an “inducement.” …

Trade Update: Westbrook says he won’t report to the Jazz unless they allow him to skip all day games, ban crucifixes from the locker room and vow to never trade for Kyrie Irving. …

That’s about all the space we have for this week’s Whitley’s Believe It or Not. Till next time, if Russell Wilson’s foundation calls to ask for a donation, tell them you gave at the office.

David Whitley is The Gainesville Sun's sports columnist. Contact him at dwhitley@gannett.com. Follow him on Twitter @DavidEWhitley

This article originally appeared on The Gainesville Sun: Florida Gator Collective turned Jaden Rashada NIL recruitment into fiasco