A Valentine's story of music and memories

Feb. 13—LEDYARD — Ron Gletherow and Margaret Cafarelli lived thousands of miles away from each other and knew only one person in common. Unfortunately, that person had died 25 years earlier in a terrible plane crash.

Still, it was precisely because of the fame of their mutual connection that Ron and Margaret found themselves in the same hotel one day in September 1998, where they met for the first time. She was from Ledyard, and he from London, England, both in middle age, and within two years they had married.

All because of their love of Jim Croce, the 1970s singer-songwriter whose hits included "Time in a Bottle," "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown" and "Operator." It was music and memories that brought them together.

"I thought he was just like the best looking guy I'd ever seen," said Margaret of her impression upon meeting Ron for the first time.

"She became my best friend," added Ron in his Cockney accent.

Both had taken music seriously from an early age, but it was Ron who made a bit of a living at it, playing gigs around London in bands and as a solo act. One of his favorite singers to cover was Croce, the promising American songwriter whose career tragically ended in a 1973 plane crash in Louisiana at the height of his fame, one day before the release of his hit "I Got A Name."

By kismet and with the help of his children who sent a demo tape, Ron had received his 15 minutes of fame a few months before he met Margaret after performing Croce's "I'll Have to Say I Love You in a Song" on the popular English television show "Stars in Their Eyes," where he was seen by over 10 million viewers. Ron didn't win the competition, but he was one of only 60 people chosen to compete out of perhaps 50,000 entries.

It was while at the television studio that he learned of a Jim Croce fan gathering being planned in Philadelphia a few months down the road. He quickly determined to go, traveling to the United States for the first time while taking time off from his job as an electrician at the Ford Motor Co. auto assembly plant where he worked.

But when he got to the hotel and asked about the fan gathering, the person at the front desk said she didn't have any idea what he was talking about. Crushed, he thought he'd been duped.

It wasn't long, though, before other Croce fans began arriving, and people soon were playing their favorite tunes and listening to stories about the fabled singer from some of his family and friends. With only about 30 people at the gathering, that meant Ron and Margaret spent plenty of time together getting acquainted as each took turns strumming on their guitars and singing the tunes they'd grown up with a quarter century before.

"Everybody was pretty much playing guitar, having a good time," said Margaret, who first learned her instrument by listening to Croce songs and trying to imitate the guitar parts.

"i just loved his voice and his music," Margaret said. "I think it was 'Time in a Bottle,' the song that I really fell in love with. ... And then, you know, I bought all his albums and just sort of became a fanatic. Everybody thought I'd get over it someday, and I was just going through a phase."

After the gathering, they kept in touch by email for two years, getting closer 3,500 miles away.

"Soon we're emailing each other like every day," Margaret said.

Finally, in 2000, they arranged another, smaller Croce fan gathering of themselves and a couple of friends in New York City, deciding spontaneously to get married a few months later in England.

Margaret was 43 and never previously married; she also had never been out of the United States, nor had she ever flown in a plane. He was divorced and nearly 50 with three adult daughters (and now with nine grandchildren and six great-grandchildren). One of his daughters lent Margaret her wedding dress for the civil ceremony, and the bride's brother Johnny showed up unexpectedly, adding to the festivity.

"Time in a Bottle," of course, was one of the songs played during the wedding day.

They recently celebrated their 23rd wedding anniversary, and around their Ledyard home they have several Jim Croce mementos, including a leather image of the singer, a photo and a handwritten note.

"His success story only lasted about two years," Ron said. "He could have gone on to do all kinds of things. ... There's so many songs he would have written if he had lived."

Margaret currently runs a pet-sitting business, while Ron helps out with her business and spends much of his time writing songs, recording and arranging music, recently ending a long stint as a guitar teacher (though he retains one longtime student). Not long ago, Ron wrote a song about the aftermath of Sandy Hook, and also in the past few years completed an audio project called "Evacuees" about his older siblings who were evacuated from London during World War II.

His most recent project is as songwriter and arranger for "Crossing," an original musical based on a true immigrant story to be performed March 1-3 at the Granite Theatre in Westerly co-written with Mike Bailey that will feature "The Voice" semifinalist Braiden Sunshine, one of Ron's former guitar students. For tickets and information, call (401) 596-2341 or visit thegranitetheatre@gmail.com.

For more than a dozen years, Ron and Margaret along with Bailey and Day columnist Steve Fagin had a band called Maggie's Guitar that played gigs throughout the region. Ron started the band in 2005, but decided he really needed a backup guitar player, so he naturally turned to Margaret (also known as Maggie), who, true to form as an introvert, demurred.

Not long afterward, Margaret saw a guitar she badly wanted. So Ron made a deal: He would buy the guitar if Margaret would play in the band, and she finally agreed.

Only one thing left to do: name the band. That's when the couple's friend Paul Williams, the famed songwriter ("Old Souls," "I Won't Last a Day without You"), came through. Knowing the story of Margaret's reluctant decision to join the group, Williams (who got to know the couple after they shared an underground copy of Croce playing and talking about Paul Williams' songs) said the band's name had to be Maggie's Guitar.

Maggie's Guitar played a variety of original and cover songs, including two concerts at the Katharine Hepburn Cultural Center in Old Saybrook honoring Croce's legacy. They also put on a 2013 concert on the 40th anniversary of the singer's death at Croce's former high school, which provided seed money for a music scholarship there.

Afterward, "We decided we never were going to be able to top that," Ron said. "That should be the end of the Jim Croce tributes."

Both of them said they love Croce's music because of its storytelling quality.

"He kind of told the American story," Margaret said.

"When you listen to him, it feels like he's sitting in your living room," Ron added.

Sitting in their own living room last week, Ron and Margaret said they don't have any Valentine's Day traditions as they contemplated the improbability of meeting 25 years ago. But they have a shared love of music and still regularly attend concerts together.

They point out that A.J. Croce, Jim's only son, is a talented musician in his own right who has started performing his father's music in concerts around the country. With so many of Croce's childhood friends and bandmates dying off recently, they are happy to see that the man who wrote "Time in a Bottle" is not forgotten.

And perhaps on Valentine's Day they'll take a moment to enjoy the sentiment of Croce's most romantic song, penned for his wife, Ingrid, right after he learned that she was pregnant with son A.J.:

If I had a box just for wishes

And dreams that had never come true

The box would be empty

Except for the memory

Of how they were answered by you

l.howard@theday.com