'We've got big goals': Monroe school district ramps up anti-bullying efforts

On April 19, Gary Ross, 13, a Monroe Middle School eighth grader, died by suicide. His family blamed bullying.Days later, Gary's classmates led a demonstration at the school. The same week, parents staged a "Justice for Gary" rally. Participants at both events demanded an end to bullying.

"Schools are not doing anything," Ronald Ross, Gary’s dad, said. "They say zero tolerance, but it's not. It's not zero tolerance. They're not doing what they could be doing to stop the bullying."

Andrew Shaw, Monroe Public Schools superintendent, attended both events. He was surprised by some of what he heard.

"To think it was as big as what was shared, no, we didn't believe it was that big," Shaw said. “Parents felt their kids were going through stuff and the school never did anything about it and bullies were still in the building. Our kids believe it’s not being addressed. We’re listening to our parents and students. We knew we had to do a better job of educating students, staff and parents.”

Earlier Coverage: Family, friends of Monroe eighth grader who died by suicide seek bullying changes

Shaw promised things would change.

For the last five months, he and MPS staff have been working to create new plans for the district's 4,460 students.Shaw spoke with students and parents. He brought in a nationally known trainer to work with staff. This fall, that trainer will work with students and parents. He unrolled a more strict, progressive discipline plan. And help is in place to work with bullies.

The first step was listening. Shaw heard from students in person and through anonymous online forms.

“Students voiced their opinions on what wasn’t working. They were pretty clear,” Shaw said.

MMS students, for example, told him cyberbullying wasn’t the biggest problem.

“It was face-to-face. I thought for sure cyber was the number one,” Shaw said.

He was impressed by the words of three students who had been bullied.

“They had empathy for the bully. They recognized the (bully) may have been bullied by parents, may have come for a situation of pain and agony, and they bring it to school and release it to others. It was extremely mature of these students to recognized this,” Shaw said.

Just before school began last week, Marcia McEvoy of Grand Rapids, a licensed psychologist and specialist in preventing teen suicide, was brought in to work with MPS staff. McEvoy has traveled the country for more than 20 years, speaking about bullying. She’s written a book and is working on another. She's seen success.

“Schools that have implemented the core components of the process I outline have seen anywhere from a 50 to 80% reduction in aggressive behavior (the whole range, including mean behavior, name calling, taunting, relational aggression, intimidation, bullying, harassment, racism) within two years of implementation,” McEvoy said.

This fall, McEvoy will spend 24 days in the district, working with students and parents. The parent program will show families how to intervene in children's aggressive behavior and will offer strategies families can use to empower children who are targets and bystanders.

Shaw called her program “powerful.”

“She’s going to every building and doing evening activities for parents. It’s a really cool program. We’re going to push it out to families. We really hope they will come. We have two so far (no dates have been set). If an overwhelming number attend, we’ll open up more sessions,” Shaw said.

In all the buildings, Shaw said staff will work with students to encourage kindness and also to define “bullying,” which isn’t the same as isolated mean behavior.

“Everything is called bullying. One of the challenges is, what is truly bullying and what’s just an isolated incident? Many times, it’s an isolated incident. I remind parents, bullying is a repeated situation by another person. Maybe someone’s being a jerk today. They should be held accountable, but that is not bullying, and we address it differently,” Shaw said.

But when behavior is investigated and deemed bullying, an updated, progressive discipline plan will begin for that student.

“We’re ratcheting this up to an even higher level. We’re closing the loop. We’re taking it to an extremely high level of tracking,” Shaw said.

A first instance of bullying will involve low-level disciple, like a conversation. But, if bullying continues, discipline will increase to perhaps a one-day suspension, then a three- to five-day suspension, all the way up to expulsion. At each step, the bully’s and the victim’s parents will be notified.

“If it’s repeated, we continue to move up in progression. It will go from a conversation all the way to suspension. Based on what’s happening and the severity of what they did, it could be expulsion,” Shaw said.

McEvoy stressed the need to hold students accountable and to be consistent.

“We have to be extremely consistent,” Shaw said. “If we are inconsistent from class to class, we lose ground with kids.”

But, at the same time, the district wants to work with bullies, to help them heal from whatever is causing their behavior.

“(You may want to) see (the bully) thrown into Siberia for the rest of their life. But we are dealing with kids, and their brains are not fully developed. We have to help address it,” Shaw said. “Bullies usually have some form of trauma. We can use resources, social workers, counselors and people who have a great relationship (with the bully). We’ve got to change the behavior and show them the effect of their behavior. Monroe is beautiful in this way, we have resources in our buildings for our students.”

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Shaw urges all to help the district in its efforts to curb bullying.

“I want our kids to see we’re doing more than they thought,” Shaw said. “Our plea to parents and students, come alongside of us, work alongside of us and give us a chance. We’re moving forward. We’re going to need their help. We’ve got big goals. We have do it together.”

To learn more about McEvoy, visit marciamcevoy.com.

Reporting bullying

Monroe Public Schools students who are victims of mean behavior and/or bullying should go their building principal. They also can submit an online form through the district's website, monroe.k12.mi.us/form/bully.cfm. Online submitters can choose to remain anonymous.

Andrew Shaw, MPS superintendent, said 34 bullying incidents were officially reported in the district last school year. School staff investigate and follow up on each reported case.

“We see every single one. One or two a week come through for kindergarten up to 12. Some reports are vague. Others are more detailed. We follow up on it and investigate,” Shaw said.

Bullying at any Michigan school also can be be reported on the state's OK2Say site at michigan.gov/ok2say. Tips go to the Michigan State Police.

This article originally appeared on The Monroe News: Monroe school district ramps up anti-bullying efforts