Where Is the ‘First Wives Club’ Sequel We Actually Want?

On Wednesday, Deadline reported that Susan Sarandon, Bette Midler, and Megan Mullally are teaming up for a buddy comedy called The Fabulous Four. Unfortunately, it will not be the tragically overdue sequel to The First Wives Club, which is where our minds automatically go whenever we see Midler’s name in a headline. Nor is it a follow-up to Thelma & Louise, though we recognize that any hopes for that sequel are futile for, um, obvious reasons.

Directed by Jocelyn Moorhouse (The Dressmaker), The Fabulous Four will be about a group of longtime friends from college played by Sarandon, Mullally and Midler. Sarandon and Mullally’s characters travel to Florida together to be bridesmaids in their friend Marilyn’s (Midler) surprise wedding, where they reminisce and rekindle bonds from their past. Viewers can probably also expect a heavy dose of hijinks, a word that is only ever used to describe movies exactly like this one.

The first thing that stands out about this pretty generic (but nonetheless exciting! Bette Midler makes everything exciting!) description of a feel-good comedy is the title. Calling a movie about three best friends The Fabulous Four–not to be confused with Queer Eye’s Fab Five–is a confusing move, unless of course there is a yet-to-be-revealed fourth member of the crew…

…Which means it’s not too late to turn this into a First Wives Club reunion after all! What are Goldie Hawn and Diane Keaton up to these days? We’d even take Stockard Channing, who was frankly under-utilized in the 1996 comedy. Should none of these talented ladies be available, allow us to suggest Jean Smart or Catherine O’Hara for the part of the fabulous fourth.

With a script penned by Moorhouse, Jenna Milly, and Ann Marie Allison, The Fabulous Four is set to begin filming in Key West in September. In the meantime, someone get Goldie Hawn’s agent on the phone, stat.

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