Whitley's Believe It Or Not: It was a bad week for the golf gods, but a good week for golf
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It wasn’t the wind and rain that made three pine trees crash down at The Masters last Friday. It was the golf gods.
They were not pleased that Brooks Koepka had zoomed to the top of the leaderboard. Thank goodness he didn’t win on Sunday, or the gods might have unleashed an invasion of locusts on Augusta National.
The last thing the golf establishment wanted was for an LIV Tour member to win a green jacket. It didn’t thrill me either, but you have to give the devil (or LIV boss Greg Norman) his due.
Koepka, Phil Mickelson and Patrick Reed finished in the top four, dispelling criticism that the LIV is basically a mercenary tour that ill prepares players for real golf. Heck, I don’t think Mickelson had broken 100 since last April.
The best spin I can put on it is that the LIV’s strong showing helps the overall sport. Controversy sells, and the Good vs. Evil storyline has been recharged.
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Not that the LIV golfers are necessarily evil for becoming employees of the Saudi Arabia P.R. Department. I just wish they would stop saying they’re doing it to “grow the game.”
“They’re full of (bleep),” LIV member Harold Varner III told the Washington Post. “They’re growing their pockets. I tell them all the time, all of them, ‘You didn’t come here to (bleeping) grow the (bleeping) game.’”
Intentional or not, they also came to help Norman achieve his life goal of sticking it to the PGA Tour. If the LIV had flopped in its first major outing, we could have laughingly dismissed the entire project.
Now people can argue over Saudi sportswashing, Mickelson’s legacy and whether LIV guys are full of bleep until the PGA Championship in May. And if Koepka or Reed win that, expect a few more trees to tumble down. …
Stud of the Week: The Tampa Bay Rays, for starting the year 9-0 and outscoring opponents 75-18. If they keep this up, Tropicana Field might sell out by mid-August.
Stud II: The Rocket City Trash Pandas, the Angels’ Double-A affiliate, for tossing a no-hitter against the Chattanooga Lookouts.
Dud of the Week: The Rocket City Trash Pandas bullpen, for walking five batters and hitting four more to give the Lookouts a 7-5 win despite not getting a hit. …
NBA playoffs open but load-management plans remain the rage
The NBA Playoffs begin this week. In keeping with the Lakers’ load-management plan, Anthony Davis will sit out the 2023 postseason in order to be ready for next year’s playoffs. …
Congrats to Quinnipiac University for beating Minnesota to win the NCAA hockey championship, and to anyone out there who knew Quinnipiac wasn’t just a polling service. …
The NHL Playoffs also begin this week. In keeping with hockey's load-management tradition, at least three guys will break their legs in the first round but will not miss a shift. …
Quinnipiac II: Coach Rand Pecknold was so emotional after the Fighting Pollsters won the national championship, he asked ESPN reporter Colby Cohen to give him a hug.
Connecticut Senator Richard Blumenthal broke his leg during Saturday’s victory parade for UConn’s basketball team. In keeping with U.S. Senate load management tradition, the 77-year-old Blumenthal will miss the next eight Congressional sessions and then vote for a $13 trillion Medicaid expansion. …
If a tree falls at Augusta National and doesn't hit Tiger Woods, does CBS hear it? ...
Rocket City Redux: I don’t know how the city’s baseball team got its nickname, but I’m pretty sure the Panda Defamation League will eventually demand the team to change it to something less offensive. …
According to the Elias Sports Bureau, Bill Belichick has never asked a reporter to give him a hug. ...
Ex-Gators finish second to Christian McCaffrey
Christian McCaffrey announced his engagement last week to former Miss Universe/internet celebrity Olivia Culpo. She had previously been romantically linked to former Olympic/UF swimmer Ryan Lochte and Tim Tebow.
Apparently, it’s great to date a Florida Gator, but you don’t want to marry one. …
Saudi Sportswashing Update: Argentina’s World Cup hero Lionel Messi is reportedly considering a $400-million-a-year offer from Riyadh club Al-Hilal. A Quinnipiac poll found that for $400 million, 93% of male respondents said they would wear a Nike sports bra while hugging Bill Belichick.
I hate to say it, but I think Richard Blumenthal has a better chance of winning the Masters than Tiger Woods. ...
No SEC team has ever won an NCAA hockey championship. In hopes of changing that, Texas A&M’s NIL is considering buying Finland. …
That’s about all the space we have for this week’s Whitley’s Believe It or Not. Until next time, if you find a panda rooting through your trash, please teach them how to throw a decent curveball.
David Whitley is The Gainesville Sun's sports columnist. Contact him at dwhitley@gannett.com. Follow him on Twitter @DavidEWhitley
This article originally appeared on The Gainesville Sun: LIV's Masters performance will keep golf's controversial drama going
