Woke or joke: DeSantis cribs from Churchill speech while campaigning in Iowa

Gov. Ron DeSantis, bless his heart, needs some speechwriting help as he serves the people of Florida by campaigning in other states for a better job.

There are only so many ways you can use “woke” in a sentence, and it appears that DeSantis is exhausting them.

So, he has taken to grafting his small-minded, divisive sloganeering onto the inspiring speeches of great men.

Here’s how he’s practicing this form of intellectual vandalism in Iowa:

“As president, I recognize that the woke mind virus represents a war on the truth so we will wage a war on the woke,” DeSantis said.

“We will fight the woke in education, we will fight the woke in corporations, we will fight the woke in the halls of congress,” he continued. “We will never, ever surrender to the woke mob. We will leave ideology to the dustbin of history.”

More: Gov. Ron DeSantis aids Elon Musk, the richest man in world, while decrying "the elites"

More: Frank Cerabino: School announcement outside jail? High cost of politicizing school boards in Florida

More: Florida lawmakers propose spending $100 million for DeSantis' own civilian militia

That has echoes to a similarly cadenced rallying speech Winston Churchill delivered to the British people in 1940 after Hitler’s army drove the Brits from Dunkirk and threatened to bring the war to the British mainland.

“We shall go on to the end … “ Churchill said. “We shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be.

“We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”

If Churchill’s oratory about a life and death struggle against a Nazi invasion could be recast to a complaint about rainbow stickers and unvarnished Black history, well then anything is possible.

So, I’ve DeSantisized other great speeches to serve the political aims of the candidate who obviously needs to lean on bigger men with bigger ideas in order to fill the void of his own smallness.

President John F. Kennedy’s inauguration speech

Kennedy:  “And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.

DeSantisized:  “And so my fellow Republican primary voters in this South Carolina Waffle House: ask not what book banning can do for you — ask what you can do for book banning.”

Franklin D. Roosevelt’s first inaugural address

Roosevelt: This great Nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself — nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.

DeSantisized: For the real Americans like you and me — and not the elite Soros-backed woke-mob majority — we will endure, as we have endured, and will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is trans kids going to the bathroom in public schools.

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech

King: “So even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

DeSantisized: So even though we face the difficulties of diversity, equality, and inclusion, I have a dream, a dream deeply rooted in saying “woke” over and over again.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up against “the woke” and stop taking their kids to Disney World. I have a dream.

I have a dream that one day, from the red voting precincts of rural America to the socialist, hate-America cities and suburbs, people will sit down at the table of woke-free brotherhood to hate on drag queens, refer to life-saving vaccinations as “jabs” and go to Sea World instead.

I have a dream, which you tend to do when you’re not woke.

Frank Cerabino is a columnist at The Palm Beach Post, part of the USA TODAY Florida Network. You can reach him at fcerabino@gannett.com.

This article originally appeared on Palm Beach Post: Gov. Ron DeSantis borrows from Churchill speech on campaign trail