Woman astounded by boyfriend’s unexpected ‘stay-at-home mom’ request: ‘This is a huge red flag’
A woman’s boyfriend is demanding she become a stay-at-home mom.
She took to Reddit’s “Am I the A******?” forum after he made her feel like a “horrible person.” She wants to continue pursuing her career, but her boyfriend wants her to stay at home if they have kids. When she suggested he be the stay-at-home parent, he became furious.
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“My boyfriend and I have recently started talking about kids,” she wrote. “We thought we were on the same page until he brought up me being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). The problem is, I have never wanted to be a SAHM and have never expressed wanting to do so.”
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“When I expressed that I have zero interest in doing that, he started going on and on about how he doesn’t want babysitters raising our kids and that it’d be best for me to. I understand that having a long-term babysitter might feel like you’re not raising a kid, but I had one my whole childhood, and I still feel as if my parents raised me.”
Her boyfriend accused her of destroying any connection she might have with her future kids.
“This started a whole argument, and I mentioned that if he wanted a stay-at-home parent, then he should be one,” she said. “This pissed him off even more, as he feels like I don’t have a plan to make enough money to take care of a family of three or four and that I’m putting work before my own flesh and blood.”
“He says that me choosing work would ruin the bond between me and our future kids. Him saying that really has me thinking that I’m a horrible person for wanting to work instead of being at home full-time.”
Redditors thought the boyfriend was being sexist.
“This is a huge red flag for the relationship,” a user wrote.
“The 1920s called and they want their gender roles back,” another said.
“When men are oppressed, it’s a tragedy, but when women are oppressed, it’s a tradition,” some commented.
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